formby
learning in progress
hey guys
what's up?
ill get right to my dilemma/depressive story...
right after my son was born [1-10-8] i started a new job at another advertising company as the director of customer service. i took a pay cut of 4,160 a year and i have more responsibilities. however i dont have to travel 60 miles a day and i am appreciated more for my work at this new job. so it kind of rounds itself out.
however this company is not meeting the sales goals set forth by the executives and we are not making much money. with this in mind i have been stressing. if the company closes i will be out of a job and i know that no place will pay me the amount that i get now. so i'm freaking out.
i have been trying to escape this stress by drinking heavily and smoking a lot of pot [more than usual] and taking xanax. the drinking has affected my mental and body health also my family life has suffered. my wife is worried about me and my mom thinks that i have gone over the edge.
i just came back from puerto rico and i had an [i was drunk] argument with my father about things that happened in my past with regards to him my mother and i. i.e when my mom brought me to the states my dad cut off his relation ship with her and i for years. and when i crashed my accord he stopped paying for my college.
we argued for about an hour and buried everything right then and there. however, the thing that still hurts me the most is the he still tells me that i'm fucked for the rest of my life because i did not finish school and that my son is his revenge as a father.
when it was all over i regretted being drunk at that time and i also had no reason to be drunk. no one but me was drinking and i over did it.
i have accepted the fact that i am an alcoholic and a drug addict and that i need help.
i want to turn my life around but i dont know how. i want to study public relations but i have no money.
i feel so depressed, i feel like i have let down every one that loves me and myself. i want my son to have everything he needs and most of all i want him to know that he has a father that will be there for him no matter his failures.
i wish i could turn time back and really study and dedicate my self to my education, but since i cant i guess ill just have to deal with it and suffer the consequences.
how do you guys handle circumstanced like this?
cliff notes
i am feeling like shit. ^_^
what's up?
ill get right to my dilemma/depressive story...
right after my son was born [1-10-8] i started a new job at another advertising company as the director of customer service. i took a pay cut of 4,160 a year and i have more responsibilities. however i dont have to travel 60 miles a day and i am appreciated more for my work at this new job. so it kind of rounds itself out.
however this company is not meeting the sales goals set forth by the executives and we are not making much money. with this in mind i have been stressing. if the company closes i will be out of a job and i know that no place will pay me the amount that i get now. so i'm freaking out.
i have been trying to escape this stress by drinking heavily and smoking a lot of pot [more than usual] and taking xanax. the drinking has affected my mental and body health also my family life has suffered. my wife is worried about me and my mom thinks that i have gone over the edge.
i just came back from puerto rico and i had an [i was drunk] argument with my father about things that happened in my past with regards to him my mother and i. i.e when my mom brought me to the states my dad cut off his relation ship with her and i for years. and when i crashed my accord he stopped paying for my college.
we argued for about an hour and buried everything right then and there. however, the thing that still hurts me the most is the he still tells me that i'm fucked for the rest of my life because i did not finish school and that my son is his revenge as a father.
when it was all over i regretted being drunk at that time and i also had no reason to be drunk. no one but me was drinking and i over did it.
i have accepted the fact that i am an alcoholic and a drug addict and that i need help.
i want to turn my life around but i dont know how. i want to study public relations but i have no money.
i feel so depressed, i feel like i have let down every one that loves me and myself. i want my son to have everything he needs and most of all i want him to know that he has a father that will be there for him no matter his failures.
i wish i could turn time back and really study and dedicate my self to my education, but since i cant i guess ill just have to deal with it and suffer the consequences.
how do you guys handle circumstanced like this?
cliff notes
i am feeling like shit. ^_^