My dad used to have a Maserati Bora
And this Bora was MADNESS. it's a V8 under glass, low slung and really exotic. Well, this is about the 70s and he pulled up to a friend of his.
His friend says "Hey, that's a damned nice car!". His friend is on an old Vespa scooter. But my dad and his friends are always busting balls.
His friend says "That's nice, but I bet this Vespa can beat it!". My dad laughs it off, and dismisses it as a joke. The light turns green and my dad takes off with the Maserati.
Well, much to his surprise his friend is right there, on the side of the car ! He takes it from 60 to 80, and looks over his shoulder, to see his friend backing off.. But just as soon, the Vespa starts to FLY up on his ass and take him.
So my dad, he drops it down a gear and TAKES THE FUCK OFF. Now he's doing like 120. The Vespa falls behind again, but then starts reeling him in. So my dad is doing 120 down the road, with a Scooter in TIGHT pursuit. My dad can't figure out what the fuck is going on, so he gives it a final shot, floors it, takes it to the limits, and up to about 140, 150ish.
The scooter is left behind but then WHACK smashes into the back of this beautiful Bora. There is smashed glass everywhere, and his buddy is lodged into the back of the engine cover, getting intimate with the V8. My dad stops as quickly as he can, and he gets to survey the damage.
Well his friend was actually fine, in fact as luck would have it, the scooter exploded and he was left hanging onto the Maserati. He was conscious and breathing, responding and not cut up too badly. My dad is concerned about him, but he HAS to ask
"What the FUCK did you do to that fucking scooter to make it do 160 ?! "
His friend says "Fuck you, asshole! MY SUSPENDERS WERE WRAPPED AROUND YOUR FUCKING MIRROR"
