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embarrasing moments

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by pissedoffsol, Jul 13, 2004.

  1. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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    yet another funny forward :)


    Subject: Embarassing Moments FUNNYYYYYY!



    Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words
    back...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the testimonials of a
    few people who did....


    1. I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and
    asked loudly... "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I
    turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't
    say a word... he knew better.

    2. I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was
    unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several
    minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at

    the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him
    and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."

    3. My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a
    variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy
    behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just
    looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy
    grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has
    never let me forget.

    4. While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release
    some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of her
    after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I told
    her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be punished.
    To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just
    as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that

    I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The silence was deafening
    after this frightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were
    doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with

    my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me
    was screams of laughter.

    5. Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My
    three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on
    him constantly. One day we topped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in
    between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying
    my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my
    seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had

    not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he

    said "No." I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I

    don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you
    didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied. I just KNEW that he must have
    had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one
    more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up,
    yanked down his pan! ts, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled, "SEE
    MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their
    tacos laughing! He calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple
    made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

    6. This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very
    embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think before

    she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any... a true
    story . We had a female news anchor that, the day after it was supposed to
    have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and asked: "So Bob,
    where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not only did HE have to
    leave the set, but half the crew did too ... they were laughing so hard!
     
  2. Havok

    Havok Senior Member

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    I started that email back in 1997 :p

    I have gotten that email a few times, I thought I posted it.
     
  3. jamesA

    jamesA Well known pissed off telephone guy VIP

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    hahahahhahahahahahahahaha
     
  4. Guy

    Guy Senior Member

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  5. handlebarsfsr

    handlebarsfsr Senior Member

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    (true story)
    my boss and i were in ace hardware, buyin some shit for work. it had been a long day, and he knows the people there well, and so he was talkin and tellin em what he needed one of which was some clapboard for a repair job. but he forgot to ask for the clapboard, so as the sales guy walked away, my boss says loudly in a store full of people "hey buddy do you have the clap?" i fell over laughing, and we got some really weird looks, and it took him a few seconds to realize what he had said, and so he says "oh shit i mean clapboard.. i know you dont have chlamidia".
     
  6. lowandslow

    lowandslow Senior Member

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    welcome back b
    u been MIA for a few days
     
  7. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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    uhhh no i haven't, but ok :) hi
     
  8. asmallsol

    asmallsol Super Moderator

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  9. JDMilan

    JDMilan Senior Member

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    lololo,,,all pretty good...lol
     
  10. DarkHand

    DarkHand Senior Member VIP

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    If that's true, there's got to be video of it somewhere.... And I want to see it. :)
     
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