but if they draw a smilie face on your coffee, its on
you're a weird dude brian
I'm officially an ugly chick magnet
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but if they draw a smilie face on your coffee, its on
you're a weird dude brian
+1I also often test the plastic guards they put on the corners of displays and such.
Maybe its because my mom never let me do it when I was 10.
K2e2vin
Senior Member
I do the same shit. When the aisle is straight I still let the rear end slide sideways. 
lol-- the mowhawk was the shit. the chicks liked it 
and i only had it for 3 days
About the simily face on my coffee cup... shes 18. fun to look at, but she's still in high school... i'm all set.
it's not like i persued it or anything.
although she did try to get me to go to Illusions with her lol
and i only had it for 3 days About the simily face on my coffee cup... shes 18. fun to look at, but she's still in high school... i'm all set.
it's not like i persued it or anything.
although she did try to get me to go to Illusions with her lol
CiViC_SOHC
Senior Member
I can hit itQuoted post[/post]]
lol-- the mowhawk was the shit. the chicks liked it
About the simily face on my coffee cup... shes 18. fun to look at, but she's still in high school... i'm all set.
it's not like i persued it or anything.
although she did try to get me to go to Illusions with her lol
Im only 17 woot haha! Anyways, ya man just try not to draw attention to yourself in front of the fugly's...I bet you meant to hit her cart huh? hah!
damn, here i am thinking i'm the only retard drifting the cart and smashing into shit...
you wanna get some chicks, go to wal mart...
the largest selection by far, as far as stores are concerned anyway...
except for bath and body works and vic's secret...
like going to a brand new playground when you're 5 years old...
everything is so new and fresh, you just want to play there all day...
no gum stuck on the slide and no squeky swings...
and why does the chick on page one look like she's crying?
you wanna get some chicks, go to wal mart...
the largest selection by far, as far as stores are concerned anyway...
except for bath and body works and vic's secret...
hit it and forget it... 18 year olds are funnnnnn...
like going to a brand new playground when you're 5 years old...
everything is so new and fresh, you just want to play there all day...
no gum stuck on the slide and no squeky swings...
and why does the chick on page one look like she's crying?
you guys make me feel better about my self. when i go food shopin i ride on the front side back wheelies u name it. and now i know im not alone but i never see anyone else doing it i dont get it.
and walmart is key for the bitches. they love to shop and save money and there are lights and flashing things to destract them when not wanted.
and walmart is key for the bitches. they love to shop and save money and there are lights and flashing things to destract them when not wanted.
Wal-Mart ownz especially if you live in a college town. lots of hot college chicks shop at Wal-Mart...esepcially at late at night
its kind of sad when you live in an area that the only thing to do after 9pm is to go to walmart
i have still not gotten kicked out yet, even during the handicapped power shopping cart/wheel chair incident...
i have still not gotten kicked out yet, even during the handicapped power shopping cart/wheel chair incident...
LOL this sounds like an interesting story. please tell us...
this would be the same night as the 3 foot naked barbie incident but thats a whole diffrent story
lol
i think it was apple pucker night, everyone bought a bottle of apple pucker to devour as the night went along...
i think i had borrowed my sisters 4 door civic to go to the movies or some non sense...
somehow we ended up in wal mart, all pretty sloppy and such, i was the sober one of the group as i was driving...
i don't remember all that much, we had 2 people on the electric cart at a time, had a person on the back trying to get it to pull wheelies...
did you know if you drop a hanger under the wheels of those carts they get jammed up? and then if you still try and go they slam up and down and jerk all around?
nothing really too interesting about the story, at one point i was the retard in the cart, with a helmet and retard sounds effects in full force...
i think they were afraid to yell at us or tell us to get out as they thought i really was challenged...
caught a couple employees laughing, to which i yelled, don't laugh at me, i'm normal like everyone else, and made my speedy get away on the slowest cart from hell...
it eventually ran out of juice and got abandoned in the sports section under a couple ice chests and other random sporting good stuffs...
those carts also do an amazing job of knocking every single item off of a shelf as you drive down the aisle...
lol
i think it was apple pucker night, everyone bought a bottle of apple pucker to devour as the night went along...
i think i had borrowed my sisters 4 door civic to go to the movies or some non sense...
somehow we ended up in wal mart, all pretty sloppy and such, i was the sober one of the group as i was driving...
i don't remember all that much, we had 2 people on the electric cart at a time, had a person on the back trying to get it to pull wheelies...
did you know if you drop a hanger under the wheels of those carts they get jammed up? and then if you still try and go they slam up and down and jerk all around?
nothing really too interesting about the story, at one point i was the retard in the cart, with a helmet and retard sounds effects in full force...
i think they were afraid to yell at us or tell us to get out as they thought i really was challenged...
caught a couple employees laughing, to which i yelled, don't laugh at me, i'm normal like everyone else, and made my speedy get away on the slowest cart from hell...
it eventually ran out of juice and got abandoned in the sports section under a couple ice chests and other random sporting good stuffs...
those carts also do an amazing job of knocking every single item off of a shelf as you drive down the aisle...
and the barbie story?
Battle Pope
Well-Known Member
ROFL
CiViC_SOHC
Senior Member
ahaha damn I wish I had funny stuff like that..
good story!!
ScrapinSi
Senior Member
See... The Walmart in my area... A bunch of teenagers, or busted ass women... Like missing teeth kinda women...
I remember the drunken walmart & grocery store days... Nothing was better than when we were having a party... about midnight, my buddy & i say we are hungry... These 2 bitches offer to cook for us... OFF TO THE GROCERY STORE!!!
We are riding on/in the carts, all over the place, being drunken fools... Doing Basketball shots of stuff into the cart... The employees were looking at us, but didnt say anything....
Until... My buddy disappears, and all of a sudden i hear "INCOMING!!!!!!!" I look up and see a loaf of bread FLYING THROUGH THE AIR... First thing that comes to mind... GOTTA CATCH IT IN THE CART!!! I haul ass down the aisle to get it, and just in time, BAM! Right into the cart! Then my hands slipped off the cart, and it slammed into a freezer... DOH!
Then you hear... You guys! OUT! NOW! They wouldn't even let us pay for what we had...
We ended up going to iHop...
But hey... At least when we got back to the house, the chick said "Sorry I couldn't cook for you"... to which i replied in a drunken stooper "Wanna give me head instead?". To which she complied...
I remember the drunken walmart & grocery store days... Nothing was better than when we were having a party... about midnight, my buddy & i say we are hungry... These 2 bitches offer to cook for us... OFF TO THE GROCERY STORE!!!
We are riding on/in the carts, all over the place, being drunken fools... Doing Basketball shots of stuff into the cart... The employees were looking at us, but didnt say anything....
Until... My buddy disappears, and all of a sudden i hear "INCOMING!!!!!!!" I look up and see a loaf of bread FLYING THROUGH THE AIR... First thing that comes to mind... GOTTA CATCH IT IN THE CART!!! I haul ass down the aisle to get it, and just in time, BAM! Right into the cart! Then my hands slipped off the cart, and it slammed into a freezer... DOH!
Then you hear... You guys! OUT! NOW! They wouldn't even let us pay for what we had...
We ended up going to iHop... But hey... At least when we got back to the house, the chick said "Sorry I couldn't cook for you"... to which i replied in a drunken stooper "Wanna give me head instead?". To which she complied...
alright, the barbie story is just the icing on the cake...
we went to middletown on the apple pucker night and the barbie incident comes into play on the return trip back from middletown wal mart via back roads..
we're cruising down this back ass winding road in the middle of no where, both of my friends still effectively smashed out of their faces...
all the sudden my drunken friends yells out to STOP!!! STOP!!!
i figured he had to puke so i pull to the side of the road and he starts yelling back up back up, i go back about 15-20 yards and he jumps out of the car without it even stopping...
apparently cruising at 40-50 mph he was able to spot a stark ass naked 3 foot tall barbie STANDING along the side of this back ass road in the middle of the night...
so first the basic, i found a GF and sexual imitations take place on this poor barbie, donkey punching etc etc...
then its decided barbie was a bad girl, and would be a very effective tool at hitting mail boxes...
let me just tell you right now that a 3 foot tall plastic barbie would survive a nuclear holocaust...
the first mailbox was rather interesting as barbie was held by her feet and when she hit the mailbox her hips gave way and she scared the shit out of my drunken friend in the back seat as she tried to smash her face through the rear window... then the technique was perfected and the adventure continued...
barbie got her head smashed on more mail boxes than i can count...
most of the time her legs gave way etc etc but this one particular mail box had no idea what it was in for...
apparently it was an very old very cheap metal mail box and it got completely OBLITERATED by barbies head...
the mailbox just crumbled and crushed and went flying into these poor peoples yard...
then the inevitable happened...
barbie's head could not take any more abuse
she was hanging out of the car having the time of her life when all the sudden she encountered a mail box that would not budge at all, yea, her head went flying...
to which my friend went on a STOP yelling adventure again and i had to back up and shine the headlights into a ditch so we could find barbies head...
we decided to leave it in the decapatation mailbox, but then decided this would be a bad idea due to fingerprints and a string of dented mailboxes along that particular road, so we retrieved barbies head and proceeded on our way
on the trip down the mountain at approx 60-70 mph barbie got her first experience at "road surfing"
i swear to all things holy that i would never imagine her plastic feet/ankles/legs were so strong and could withstand such abuse...
she must have surfed for a good mile down the road with very little damage, i think one foot was pretty warn, and the other was only missing a couple toes...
barbie was not entertained enough for my friend, so he proceeded to hold her by the hair, hang her out the window, and then roll the window up on her hair so she was dragging along side the car for the rest of the trip down the mountain...
the whole time with my friend giving her the cold shoulder and silent treatment... let her cream all she wants...
so then we finally get back into town and decide to stop in at a friends house...
the friend lives in an apt with many neighbors and took less than kindly to our barbie adventures and did not appreciate our loud obnoxious drunken behavior, or the way we were effectively trashing her appartment with what was left of a 3 foot tall plastic barbie
i think we found some scissors of shears in this friends apparement and this is when barbie first lost all her toas on one foot, then a hand, then a complete arm, and then she was quartered with much disruption and we were soon asked to leave as we were making too much noise...
we gathered all the barbie pieces we could find and made out way back to the barbie death mobile...
the town was then littered with the random pieces of barbie we had taken from the apt...
it was then decided we should stand what was left of barbie in the road and hit it with the car...
this was indeed great fun and barbie went flying through the air...
then we drove over her head, and her torso, attempted power sliding the rear wheels on barbie, the attempted doing a burn out on barbies head... but plastic tends to go flying out from under the wheels under such extreme pressure
then we all got back in the car and ran barbie over a few more times before leaving the area...
we had managed to salvage a few items, i think a arm without the hand, and the smushed head...
the arm was thrown in a yard and the head was then placed in a random mailbox somewhere along our final travelers to our destination...
and thus the barbie story... i'm sure i;m missing some good parts but thats all i have for now...
we went to middletown on the apple pucker night and the barbie incident comes into play on the return trip back from middletown wal mart via back roads..
we're cruising down this back ass winding road in the middle of no where, both of my friends still effectively smashed out of their faces...
all the sudden my drunken friends yells out to STOP!!! STOP!!!
i figured he had to puke so i pull to the side of the road and he starts yelling back up back up, i go back about 15-20 yards and he jumps out of the car without it even stopping...
apparently cruising at 40-50 mph he was able to spot a stark ass naked 3 foot tall barbie STANDING along the side of this back ass road in the middle of the night...
so first the basic, i found a GF and sexual imitations take place on this poor barbie, donkey punching etc etc...
then its decided barbie was a bad girl, and would be a very effective tool at hitting mail boxes...
let me just tell you right now that a 3 foot tall plastic barbie would survive a nuclear holocaust...
the first mailbox was rather interesting as barbie was held by her feet and when she hit the mailbox her hips gave way and she scared the shit out of my drunken friend in the back seat as she tried to smash her face through the rear window... then the technique was perfected and the adventure continued...
barbie got her head smashed on more mail boxes than i can count...
most of the time her legs gave way etc etc but this one particular mail box had no idea what it was in for...
apparently it was an very old very cheap metal mail box and it got completely OBLITERATED by barbies head...
the mailbox just crumbled and crushed and went flying into these poor peoples yard...
then the inevitable happened...
barbie's head could not take any more abuse
she was hanging out of the car having the time of her life when all the sudden she encountered a mail box that would not budge at all, yea, her head went flying...
to which my friend went on a STOP yelling adventure again and i had to back up and shine the headlights into a ditch so we could find barbies head...
we decided to leave it in the decapatation mailbox, but then decided this would be a bad idea due to fingerprints and a string of dented mailboxes along that particular road, so we retrieved barbies head and proceeded on our way
on the trip down the mountain at approx 60-70 mph barbie got her first experience at "road surfing"
i swear to all things holy that i would never imagine her plastic feet/ankles/legs were so strong and could withstand such abuse...
she must have surfed for a good mile down the road with very little damage, i think one foot was pretty warn, and the other was only missing a couple toes...
barbie was not entertained enough for my friend, so he proceeded to hold her by the hair, hang her out the window, and then roll the window up on her hair so she was dragging along side the car for the rest of the trip down the mountain...
the whole time with my friend giving her the cold shoulder and silent treatment... let her cream all she wants...
so then we finally get back into town and decide to stop in at a friends house...
the friend lives in an apt with many neighbors and took less than kindly to our barbie adventures and did not appreciate our loud obnoxious drunken behavior, or the way we were effectively trashing her appartment with what was left of a 3 foot tall plastic barbie
i think we found some scissors of shears in this friends apparement and this is when barbie first lost all her toas on one foot, then a hand, then a complete arm, and then she was quartered with much disruption and we were soon asked to leave as we were making too much noise...
we gathered all the barbie pieces we could find and made out way back to the barbie death mobile...
the town was then littered with the random pieces of barbie we had taken from the apt...
it was then decided we should stand what was left of barbie in the road and hit it with the car...
this was indeed great fun and barbie went flying through the air...
then we drove over her head, and her torso, attempted power sliding the rear wheels on barbie, the attempted doing a burn out on barbies head... but plastic tends to go flying out from under the wheels under such extreme pressure
then we all got back in the car and ran barbie over a few more times before leaving the area...
we had managed to salvage a few items, i think a arm without the hand, and the smushed head...
the arm was thrown in a yard and the head was then placed in a random mailbox somewhere along our final travelers to our destination...
and thus the barbie story... i'm sure i;m missing some good parts but thats all i have for now...