*JOkE*

[Sweet InStinct]

A guy walks into a bar with a pet
alligator by his side. He puts the
alligator up on the bar. He turns to the
astonished patrons. "I'll make you a
deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth
and place my genitals inside. Then the
gator will close his mouth for one
minute. He'll then open his mouth and
I'll remove my unit unscratched. In
return for witnessing this spectacle,
each of you will buy me a drink."

The crowd murmured their approval. The
man stood up on the bar, dropped his
pants, and placed his privates in the
alligator's open mouth. The gator closed
his mouth as the crowd gasped.

After a minute, the man grabbed a beer
bottle and rapped the alligator hard on
the top of it's head. The crowd cheered
and the first of his free drinks was
delivered.

The man stood up again and made another
offer. "I'll pay anyone $100 who's
willing to give it a try". A hush fell
over the crowd.

After a while, a hand went up in the back
of the bar. A blonde woman timidly spoke
up.

"I'll try, but you have to promise not to
hit me on the head with the beer bottle".

 

[Sweet InStinct]

What do you call a brunette standing between two
blondes?

An interpreter.


Two blondes were walking through the woods and
came upon a set of tracks. One blonde said that
they were deer tracks. The other blonde said
that they were moose tracks. They were still
arguing when the train hit 'em.


Q: Why did the blonde take drivers ed?
A: So she could learn how to sit upright in a
car!!!


How do you know when a blonde has been working on
your computer?
There's white out on the screen and lipstick on
the joystick!

Two blondes walked in to a building.
You’d think one would have seen it.

 

[sohcslammer]

 

[sohcslammer]

How does a blonde turn on the light after sex?








































Opens the car door.

 

[Sweet InStinct]

What did the blonde's left leg say to the right leg?


































Nothing. They have never met!

 

[sohcslammer]

Why is a blode like a turtle?

Once they're on their back's they're fucked.




What's the difference between a blonde and a 747.

Not everone's been on a 747.




How do you give a blonde a brain transplant?

Blow in her year.



A smart blonde, a dumb blonde, and superman are walking down the street when they come upon a $10 bill in the street. Who grabs it first?


The dumb blonde obviously. The other two don't exist!

 

[Sweet InStinct]

A blonde went to the appliance store sale and
found a bargain. "I would like to buy this TV,"
she told the salesman. "Sorry, we don't sell to
blondes," he replied.

She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back
and again told the salesman "I would like to buy
this TV." "Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he
replied.

"Darn, he recognized me," she thought. She went
for a complete disguise this time, haircut and new
color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a
few days before she again approached the salesman.
"I would like to buy this TV."

Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
Frustrated, she exclaimed "How do you know I'm a
blonde?"

"Because that's a microwave," he replied.

 

[Sweet InStinct]

Blond and brunette are watching the
news. The blond says to the brunette,
"I bet you $100 that the man won't jump
off the building." Brunette takes the
bet, and the man jumps. Brunette says,
"No, I can't take your money, I saw
this before and I knew he jumped." The
blond says, "I saw it before, too, but
I didn't think he would jump again."