a talking pickle
Master Cleanse Diet
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a talking pickle
Kanned
Beast
What 95 said. Gonna do my first salt water flush tonight. Should be fun.
So after today I'm confident I won't have any problems doing this for the 5 days I planned, so I've lost interest. For the millionth time, I didn't do this shit to lose weight and Idk how much I really care about the detoxing part lol. Guess I was just really intrigued. I've got some plans for the weekend that involve lots of sun and running around and I don't want to worry about about having a heat stroke or passing out. I'll definitely continue it through tomorrow at least. I plan to start easing back into a normal diet Fri morning at the latest, but we'll see. My metabolism is also raping the 1000 calories I'm getting a day(so far) and I don't want it to slow down
Kanned
Beast
Well, this sucks. I'm positive I can go longer because I have no food cravings, but I want to be on a normal diet by this weekend. It's a pretty important weekend to me =(.
Fuck it, guess I'll have to do it again sometime if I get the urge. For only 2 full days it was still a great learning experience. Switching back to fruits and veggies for tomorrow.
Fuck it, guess I'll have to do it again sometime if I get the urge. For only 2 full days it was still a great learning experience. Switching back to fruits and veggies for tomorrow.
Kanned
Beast
At least I don't drive a yellow electric scooter.
They're quite the underachievers, I know.
Just wait until he buys that rocket launcher.
I got pulled over on base today, and they couldn't find anything to write me a ticket for. Nothing is more fun than a cop struggling to try to find something to ticket you for, and being unable to do so.
dacheat
..is grounded.
more than you ever wanted to know about this cleanse.
chocolate milk is like a day 3 experience. day 1 is pretty normal. day 2 is like choco soft serve snake from hell. thereafter it's a daily adventure through what you've eaten and gotten lodged in your intestines, and salt water -- and get ready for it: the mucus lining from your intestines sloughing off. grody.
exactly. particularly within 15 minutes of the 'salt water flush' (appropriately named) - and don't plan on trying to make it to work for at least an hour or so afterwards.
x2, spot on. the organic B grade maple syrup is also vitamin/mineral packed if i recall..
you quit too soon to really find out what happens - but let me tell you that i saw some things i'd not eaten in 3+ weeks on day 5 and i was pretty convinced i had the all clear, and there's a story in the master cleanse book or somewhere online about a lady that was alarmed by what amounted to a whole box of jujubes showing up about 7 days in, and she'd eaten them weeks and weeks before hand. you have 26 feet of pipe curled up in your gut - this is like the biggest poop adventure ever.
did you know that the average adult human is schlepping around up to 20lbs of fecal matter? the lemons help clear a lot of fungal issues from the body as well, and the whole process can help people get off of unhealthy food crutches/cravings.
what you're saying is true, usually - but not true in this case - as ingesting the salt water flush according to the master cleanse instructions is guaranteed to power any poo you've got right out. and how.
seriously i think everyone should do 5 days of this at least once - it's a life altering experience because you really start to care what you're putting into the system, afterwards. like - i'd put a pound of bacon in before i'd put a pound of jujubes in anyday - fuck that shit.
This is the worst part of it, but it's 90% of why the cleanse works. the lemonade has it's job (nutrition from syrup, agitation from cayenne to enhance circulation, and intestinal cleanup w/lemon astringent) and the salt flush gets rid of what the lemonade's done. you can't half ass this one..it's your ass on the toilet or you're doing it wrong.
^seriously the coolest shit, ever. a vintage scooter guy here in tucson was telling me how they used to airdrop these in pairs back in the day and go blow the shit out of tanks. that's right - scooters as tank killers. rock.
@E that won't happen, because the shit won't be solid enough to hold his body weight. Think more chocolate milk.
chocolate milk is like a day 3 experience. day 1 is pretty normal. day 2 is like choco soft serve snake from hell. thereafter it's a daily adventure through what you've eaten and gotten lodged in your intestines, and salt water -- and get ready for it: the mucus lining from your intestines sloughing off. grody.
exactly. particularly within 15 minutes of the 'salt water flush' (appropriately named) - and don't plan on trying to make it to work for at least an hour or so afterwards.
x2, spot on. the organic B grade maple syrup is also vitamin/mineral packed if i recall..
you quit too soon to really find out what happens - but let me tell you that i saw some things i'd not eaten in 3+ weeks on day 5 and i was pretty convinced i had the all clear, and there's a story in the master cleanse book or somewhere online about a lady that was alarmed by what amounted to a whole box of jujubes showing up about 7 days in, and she'd eaten them weeks and weeks before hand. you have 26 feet of pipe curled up in your gut - this is like the biggest poop adventure ever.
spicy sweet lemonade - it's actually kinda addicting. it all depends on organic lemons and the B grade organic maple syrup - otherwise it's crap.Hows it taste? Good luck though.
did you know that the average adult human is schlepping around up to 20lbs of fecal matter? the lemons help clear a lot of fungal issues from the body as well, and the whole process can help people get off of unhealthy food crutches/cravings.
what you're saying is true, usually - but not true in this case - as ingesting the salt water flush according to the master cleanse instructions is guaranteed to power any poo you've got right out. and how.
seriously i think everyone should do 5 days of this at least once - it's a life altering experience because you really start to care what you're putting into the system, afterwards. like - i'd put a pound of bacon in before i'd put a pound of jujubes in anyday - fuck that shit.This is the worst part of it, but it's 90% of why the cleanse works. the lemonade has it's job (nutrition from syrup, agitation from cayenne to enhance circulation, and intestinal cleanup w/lemon astringent) and the salt flush gets rid of what the lemonade's done. you can't half ass this one..it's your ass on the toilet or you're doing it wrong.
Will it look something like THIS?
^seriously the coolest shit, ever. a vintage scooter guy here in tucson was telling me how they used to airdrop these in pairs back in the day and go blow the shit out of tanks. that's right - scooters as tank killers. rock.
Last edited:
92stoccord
Big Member
I'm suprised GTA hasn't done anything with this information.
dacheat
..is grounded.
it kinda is magic - the reason you feel like puking is not only because salt water tastes like ass, but apparently this particular mixture or ratio of salt to water results in the same weight/density/specific gravity of blood - and your body is designed to eject that stuff when it enters the digestive tract in a large quantity (like say, a quart). if you can manage to not puke it, it does find another exit - and within 15 - 20 minutes. hehe..
so yeah - the salt/water has to be pretty accurately measured for the effect. otherwise your body will not 'see' it as blood and will try to absorb the water and sodium.
chocolate milk is like a day 3 experience. day 1 is pretty normal. day 2 is like choco soft serve snake from hell. thereafter it's a daily adventure through what you've eaten and gotten lodged in your intestines, and salt water -- and get ready for it: the mucus lining from your intestines sloughing off. grody.
exactly. particularly within 15 minutes of the 'salt water flush' (appropriately named) - and don't plan on trying to make it to work for at least an hour or so afterwards.
x2, spot on. the organic B grade maple syrup is also vitamin/mineral packed if i recall..
you quit too soon to really find out what happens - but let me tell you that i saw some things i'd not eaten in 3+ weeks on day 5 and i was pretty convinced i had the all clear, and there's a story in the master cleanse book or somewhere online about a lady that was alarmed by what amounted to a whole box of jujubes showing up about 7 days in, and she'd eaten them weeks and weeks before hand. you have 26 feet of pipe curled up in your gut - this is like the biggest poop adventure ever.
spicy sweet lemonade - it's actually kinda addicting. it all depends on organic lemons and the B grade organic maple syrup - otherwise it's crap.
did you know that the average adult human is schlepping around up to 20lbs of fecal matter? the lemons help clear a lot of fungal issues from the body as well, and the whole process can help people get off of unhealthy food crutches/cravings.
what you're saying is true, usually - but not true in this case - as ingesting the salt water flush according to the master cleanse instructions is guaranteed to power any poo you've got right out. and how.
This is the worst part of it, but it's 90% of why the cleanse works. the lemonade has it's job (nutrition from syrup, agitation from cayenne to enhance circulation, and intestinal cleanup w/lemon astringent) and the salt flush gets rid of what the lemonade's done. you can't half ass this one..it's your ass on the toilet or you're doing it wrong.
Normally I love it when a girl talks dirty.
In this case....not so much.
95b16coupe
Well-Known Member
hehe.
liar, girls don't poop. ^_^
Kanned
Beast
I say he installs it aiming out the back so he can fly away after each shot.
Haha, that's great. So the cop was just hating on your scooter?
Umm, all I did was crap out the water. NOTHING else. Pretty disappointed, I actually did it again with even more salt. Omg, it was terrible. Same thing. I didn't cheat on the fast at all. Nothing but water and the cleanser.
My body naturally rejects a lot of food and I eat pretty decent. The few times I eat fast food, I can't even finish my meal before discarding every bit of what I just ate sometimes. Happens with lots of really unhealthy stuff. Whenever I'm stuck with family on road trips, they always stop at fast food joints. I get the healthiest thing I can and I just can't take it. I feel miserable unless I get real food. What I'm getting at is maybe I'm already cleansed?
Dacheat: Where the hell were you with all your knowledge before I quit? You sure do know your stuff! Thanks a ton for clearing a lot of stuff up and props for doing it for 5 days. Did you document how much weight you loss? What other benefits did you personally have? Idk how much you go down, but I don't want to lose too much weight if I am to do it again sometime.
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