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Monday Funnah

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by Capt. Orygun, Mar 20, 2006.

  1. Capt. Orygun

    Capt. Orygun Win the Day

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    > > >Hillary Clinton and her driver were cruising along a
    >country road one
    > > >evening when an old cow loomed in front of the car. The
    >driver tried
    >to
    > > >avoid it but couldn't - the old cow was killed. Hillary
    >told her
    >driver
    > > >to go up to the farmhouse and explain to the owners what
    >happened.
    >She
    > > >stayed in the car making phone calls to lobbyists.
    > > >
    > > >About an hour later, the driver staggered back to the
    >car with his
    > > >clothes in disarray. He was holding! a half empty bottle
    >of expensive
    > > >wine in one hand, an expensive Cuban cigar in the other
    >and was
    >smiling
    > > >happily, smeared with lipstick.
    > > >
    > > >"What happened?" asked Hillary.
    > > >
    > > >"Well," the driver replied, "the farmer gave me the
    >cigar, his wife
    > > >gave me the wine, and their beautiful twin daughters
    >made mad
    > > >passionate love to me."
    > > >
    > > >"My God, what did you tell them?" asked Hillary.
    > > >
    > > >The driver replied: "I said, I'm Hillary Clinton's
    >driver, and I just
    > > >killed the old cow.........and things kinda got confused
    >after that"
     
  2. Celerity

    Celerity Well-Known Member

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    HAHAHAH Nice.
     
  3. reikoshea

    reikoshea HS Troll...And Mod Moderator VIP

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  4. Battle Pope

    Battle Pope New Member

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    Hehe

    I hate Hillary Clinton.
     
  5. Bob Vila

    Bob Vila ɐןıʌ qoq Admin VIP

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  6. CiViC_SOHC

    CiViC_SOHC Senior Member

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  7. Sabz5150

    Sabz5150 FALCON PUNCH!!!

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    Snagged this off of bash.org (look! its a liberal poking at Clinton!)

    Good Book Report

    Students were assigned to read 2 books, "Titanic" & "My Life" by Bill Clinton.
    One smart-ass student turned in the following book report, with the proposition that they were nearly identical stories!
    His cool professor gave him an A+ for this report:

    Titanic:..... $29.99
    Clinton:..... $29.99

    Titanic:..... Over 3 hours to read
    Clinton:..... Over 3 hours to read

    Titanic:..... The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, and
    subsequent catastrophe.
    Clinton:..... The story of Bill and Monica, their forbidden love, and
    subsequent catastrophe.

    Titanic:..... Jack is a starving artist.
    Clinton:..... Bill is a bullshit artist.

    Titanic:..... In one scene, Jack enjoys a good cigar.
    Clinton:..... Ditto for Bill.

    Titanic:..... During ordeal, Rose's dress gets ruined.
    Clinton:..... Ditto for Monica.

    Titanic:..... Jack teaches Rose to spit.
    Clinton:..... Let's not go there.

    Titanic:..... Rose gets to keep her jewellery.
    Clinton:..... Monica's forced to return her gifts.

    Titanic:..... Rose remembers Jack for the rest of her life.
    Clinton:..... Clinton doesn't remember Jack.

    Titanic:..... Rose goes down on a vessel full of seamen.
    Clinton:..... Monica...ooh, let's not go there, either.

    Titanic:..... Jack surrenders to an icy death.
    Clinton:..... Bill goes home to Hilary...basically the same thing
     
  8. E_SolSi

    E_SolSi Member of the 20 nut club Moderator VIP

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  9. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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