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new CA barbies added for Xmas

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by jeffie7, Dec 21, 2003.

  1. jeffie7

    jeffie7 Wrong Whole! VIP

    Likes Received:
    Sep 28, 2002
    Mattel recently announced the release of Limited-Edition So-Cal dolls for
    the Southern California market:

    Irvine Barbie
    This princess Barbie is only sold at The Irvine Spectrum. She comes with an
    assortment of Kate Spade handbags, a Lexus SUV, a long-haired foreign dog
    named Honey, and a cookie-cutter house. Available with or without tummy tuck
    and face lift. Workaholic Ken sold only in conjunction with "augmented" version.

    Tustin Barbie
    This modern-day homemaker Barbie is available with Ford Windstar minivan and
    matching gym outfit. She gets lost easily and has no full time occupation or
    secondary education. Traffic-jamming cell phone sold separately.

    Van Nuys Barbie
    This recently paroled former "Porn Actress" Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun,
    a Ray Lewis knife, a Chevy with dark tinted windows, and a methlab kit. This
    model is only available after dark and can only be paid for in cash.
    Preferably in small, untraceable bills. Unless you are a cop, then we don't
    know what you are talking about.

    Santa Monica Barbie
    This yuppie Barbie comes with your choice of BMW convertible or Hummer H2.
    Included are a Starbucks travel cup, credit cards, French pedicure and
    country club membership. Also available for this set are Real Estate Magnate
    Ken and Private School Skipper. You won't be able to afford any of them.

    Fontana Barbie
    This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans two sizes too small,
    a NASCAR shirt, and Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has a six-pack
    of Coors Light and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and
    kick mullet-haired Ken's ass when she is drunk. Purchase her pickup truck
    separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free.

    Newport Beach Barbie
    This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie wears a leopard print bikini,
    Jimmy Choo slides and drinks cosmopolitans while entertaining friends at her
    beach house. Shallow Ken can be found in the cabana making out with Jail
    Bait Skipper. Percocet prescription recommended.

    Riverside Barbie
    This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie has a pair of her own high-heeled
    sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer-Gut Ken out of
    Fontana Barbie's house. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans,
    fake fingernails, and a see-through halter top.
    Also available with a mobile home.

    Laguna Beach Barbie
    This doll is made of actual tofu. She has long straight brown hair, archless
    feet, hairy armpits, no makeup, and Birkenstocks with white socks. She
    prefers that you call her "Willow". She does not want or need a Ken doll,
    but you if purchase two Laguna Beach Barbie's and the optional Subaru wagon,
    you get a rainbow flag sticker free.

    Long Beach Barbie
    This Barbie now comes with a stroller and infantdoll. Optional accessories
    include a GED and bus pass. Gangsta Ken and his '79 Caddy were available,
    but are now very difficult to find since the addition of the infant.

    Rancho Santa Margarita Barbie
    With frosted blonde hair and a French manicure, she's perfect in every way.
    We don't know who Ken is because he's always away hunting.

    City of Industry Barbie
    This Spanish-speaking-only Barbie comes with a 1984 Toyota with expired
    temporary plates and three baby Barbies in the back seat, but no car seats.
    The optional Ken doll comes with a meat-packer's uniform and is missing
    three fingers on his left hand. Green cards are not available for City of
    Industry Barbie or Ken but forged CA licenses are optional.

    West Hollywood Barbie/Ken
    This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply
    adding or subtracting the multiple "snap-on" parts.
  2. TurboMirage

    TurboMirage YEEAAAHHH VIP

    Likes Received:
    May 20, 2003
    Central, MA
  3. h22bubbleback

    h22bubbleback Senior Member

    Likes Received:
    Jul 18, 2003
    North Jerzey
  4. sportlinecrx

    sportlinecrx Banned

    Likes Received:
    Sep 28, 2002
    LMAO! i dont know where u got that but those are all pretty much on target! :lol:
  5. jamesA

    jamesA I'm a gun addict now. VIP

    Likes Received:
    Aug 10, 2003

    :bo: :bo:
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