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oh noes! JDM SPIDERS~!!!

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by pissedoffsol, Oct 22, 2004.

  1. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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    Three women in North Florida turned up at hospitals over a 5-day period, all with the same symptoms. Fever, chills, and vomiting, followed by muscular collapse, paralysis, and finally, death. There were no outward signs of trauma. Autopsy results showed toxicity in the blood.

    These women did not know each other, and seemed to have nothing in common. It was discovered, however, that they had all visited the same Restaurant (Olive Garden) within days of their deaths. The health department descended on the restaurant, shutting it down. The food, water, and air conditioning were all inspected and tested, to no avail.

    The big break came when a waitress at the restaurant was rushed to the hospital with similar symptoms... She told doctors that she had been on vacation, and had only went to the restaurant to pick up her check.
    She did not eat or drink while she was there, but had used the restroom.
    That is when one toxicologist, remembering an article he had read, drove out to the restaurant, went into the restroom, and lifted the toilet seat.

    Under the seat, out of normal view, was a small spider. The spider was captured and brought back to the lab, where it was determined to be the Two-Striped Telamonia (Telamonia dimidiata), so named because of its reddened flesh color. This spider's venom is extremely toxic, but can take several days to take effect. They live in cold, dark, damp climates, and toilet rims provide just the right atmosphere...

    Several days later a lawyer from Jacksonville showed up at a hospital emergency room. Before his death, he told the doctor, that he had been away on business, had taken a flight from Indonesia, changing planes in Singapore, before returning home. He did not visit (Olive Garden), while there. He did, as did all of the other victims, have what was determined to be a puncture wound, on his right buttock.

    Investigators discovered that the flight he was on had originated in India. The Civilian Aeronautics Board (CAB) ordered an immediate inspection of the toilets of all flights from India, and discovered the Two-Striped Telamonia (Telamonia dimidiata) spider's nests on 4 different planes!

    It is now believed that these spiders can be anywhere in the country

    .

    So please, before you use a public toilet, lift the seat to check for spiders. It can save your life!
    And please pass this on to everyone you care about.


    :ph34r: :ph34r: :ph34r: :unsure:
     
  2. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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  3. BodyDroppedNikes

    BodyDroppedNikes ...PENDEJO.... VIP

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    caught in a mosh...
    i try not to use public shitters if at all possible.
     
  4. Battle Pope

    Battle Pope New Member

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  5. GSRCRXsi

    GSRCRXsi Super Moderator Moderator VIP

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    wouldnt you realize if a spider bit you? i mean damn you are gonna feel a spider bite if you can feel a misquito bite.
     
  6. Battle Pope

    Battle Pope New Member

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  7. Airjockie

    Airjockie Watanabe Whore!!!

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    hrmmm...was this in an E-mail?


    Where's the AP news heading?.....

    Sounds like another "Lets scare the public" type email that always floats around.....

    unless there is a real valid news station reporting actual names, dates, and contactable people...I think its just another spammer spreading BS thru the intardweb.

    Besides....if the spiders just happen to survive the pressures of flying on a jumbo jet, if they was in a jet toilet, they would have been sucked out with the blue water...ever seen a jet toilet...then you would understand....

    it's the "And please pass this on to everyone you care about. " that makes it sound like another one of those damn spam emails.
     
  8. Airjockie

    Airjockie Watanabe Whore!!!

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  9. Battle Pope

    Battle Pope New Member

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  10. civicious

    civicious FüK-VTEC VIP

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    I never use public restrooms anyways.



































    I just poop on the floor.
     
  11. JDMilan

    JDMilan Senior Member

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    either way.........fuck spiders...................
     
  12. Havok

    Havok Senior Member

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    lol @ Will, you, too?

    Just kidding, but really...who shits in a public bathroom? I used my high school's toilet ONCE--they day the high school opened. I'd rather burn my gooch than shit in a public bathroom.
     
  13. h22bubbleback

    h22bubbleback Senior Member

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    i use the hover technique...:thumbsup:
     
  14. asmallsol

    asmallsol Super Moderator

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    I have to, I shit alot.
     
  15. Black Widow g2

    Black Widow g2 *princess*

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    i don't use public places if i don't have to... and i'll be sure to look out for this 'butt biting' spider you speak of... maybe
     
  16. StealthMode

    StealthMode Kung Foolin'

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    it's either STD's or spiders: pick your poison.

    or go home to drop a deuce.

    :ph34r: :ph34r: :ph34r: :ph34r:
     
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