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Ohhhhhhhhhhhh To Be A Man

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by Havok, May 28, 2003.

  1. Havok

    Havok Senior Member

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    1. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview.
    2. Your orgasms are real. Always.
    3. Your last name stays put.
    4. The garage is all yours.
    5. Wedding plans take care of themselves.
    6. You never feel compelled to stop a friend from getting laid.
    7. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
    8. You don't give a rat's ass if someone notices your new haircut.
    9. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area.
    10. Same work. More pay.
    11. Wrinkles-add character.
    12. You don't have to leave the room to make emergency crotch adjustments.
    13. Wedding Dress $2000; Tux rental $100.
    14. If you retain water, it's in a canteen.
    15. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them.
    16. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
    17. One mood, ALL the damn time.
    18. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds.
    19. A five-day vacation requires only 1 suitcase.
    20. You can open all your own jars.
    21. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
    22. Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack.
    23. If you are 34 and single, nobody notices.
    24. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat.
    25. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
    26. You can quietly watch a game with your buddy for hours without ever thinking "He must be mad at me."
    27. No maxi-pads.
    28. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
    29. You are not expecte! d to know the names of more than five colors.
    30. You do n't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
    31. You are unable to see wrinkles in clothes.
    32. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
    33. Your belly usually hides your big hips.
    34. One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
    35. You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
    36. Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in minutes.
    37. The world is your urinal.




    Ten Things men know for sure about women:

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    5.
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    10. They have breasts.
     
  2. BodyDroppedNikes

    BodyDroppedNikes ...PENDEJO.... VIP

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    caught in a mosh...
    :lol: thats great
     
  3. Jeef

    Jeef NO MA'AM Moderator VIP

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    That fawking rocks. 99% of it is true.
     
  4. E_SolSi

    E_SolSi Member of the 20 nut club Moderator VIP

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    :lol: thats good shit
     
  5. vtecsir1

    vtecsir1 Senior Member

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    heard it before but that is good
     
  6. noobvang

    noobvang Senior Member

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  7. chevy302dz

    chevy302dz Senior Member

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  8. asmallsol

    asmallsol Super Moderator

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    what 1% isn't. I can relate to everyone of them.
     
  9. JDMilan

    JDMilan Senior Member

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    I can't stand wrikles in my clothing, so I say 99%

    Nice shit very funny :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:



    Milan
     
  10. MaaseyRacer

    MaaseyRacer Senior Member

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    yes the world is my urinal, especially when I am drunk...
    :lol:
     
  11. xj0hnx

    xj0hnx I wanna be sedated VIP

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  12. BigJ

    BigJ I'm just about that action Boss. VIP

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