I wasnt going to originally post this but sh!t just seems to keep pyling on right now. SO, here's my mini rant/vent. This is what I knew....Feb 15th, my dad went into the Hospital. Sloan Kettering for the NYC peeps who know it. He was retaining water in his one leg so they put him on some dieretics(sp?) to try and make him pee like crazy and drain the water. The pills didnt work and he retained a LOT more water in his other leg as well now. They tried something else, still wasnt helping, his stomach grew quite large. They said this was contributing to his liver failing. Come to find out... On Jan 1st he went to the ER for pains in his side. They found a large mass on or near his liver. He started to have it checked out and was tested for cancer etc... By the time they discovered he had cancer and made a plan he was in the hospital on the 15th. SO, my family was going to the hospital to hang with my dad, who was telling us he was in the there to fix the water retaining thing and then get his liver healthy again. I go there on the 18th of Feb to hang out and as soon as I walk in with my mom, he tells us "that's it". We of course were puzzled and said, whats it? He said they told him they cant do anything to help him and a transplant is out of the question. "So, "That's it........" He looked very yellow and was extremely weak. I knew then something was really wrong and he was hiding something. I watched my grandfather die from cancer and he looked very similar. My dad was a lil delirious and was rambling a lil bit, I figured it was because of the liver being out of whack from the water. We just hoped he was talking sh!t and the doctor would tell us whats really going on. 3pm comes around, doc is in.....He confirms what my dad told us. He went into great detail and took all the time in the world to explain why we couldnt do anything to help him. My dad sat up, looked at all of us and said: "It's ok. Im at the best hospital for what is wrong with me and they can't help me. It is my time and I accept it.....This is god's will" Prolly the best and worst thing Ive ever heard in my entire life. So hard to watch the man I thought of as Superman be so weak and on his way out. Yet it was comforting to know that he is at peace and accepts his fate. Im grateful that he didnt suffer for months like a lot of cancer patients. But I just wish he had told us. I wouldve dropped everything in my life to spend as much time as possible with him. Especially to let him see his grand daughter some more. The last few days in the hospital we tried to get him home. We were all willing to be 24hr care and do whatever it took to have him comfy at home until he passed. That and the hospital wouldn't allow me to bring Alexis up to his room. I know my dad wanted to see her, which was the hardest part of watching him go so quickly. Feb 20th I got a call 7:00am, come to NYC quick, its looking bad today. I rushed to the city and sat by his side. He wasnt able to speak, stand, sit up or anything at all. It was just a waiting game until the final breath. They had him on a lot of Morphine since he was in such pain when he would come to. He was pretty much out of it all day with very labored breathing. Around 5pm we noticed he finally went to the bathroom. We called the nurse in to change his top sheet. About a minute later they came into the room we were in and told us to come back to the room. He waited until we walked out to go...... I went back in the room a few times after, I just couldnt believe we were really here doing what we were doing. It seemed so sureal. Even at the funeral I was waiting for him to pop up and tell us a joke or something. Those who knew my dad knew that was definately his thing I'm catholic and believe in god. I was always unsure regardless of my religion what happens when you die. Im sure I am not alone here. Our family minister told us that you dont get into heaven because youre a good person or you did nice deeds, you get in because you have faith in god and the afterlife. After losing my dad, brother and lots of friends and family all at young ages I am putting my faith in god. I want to be with them all again Sorry for the sad story and spiritual crap, but hopefully it makes you rethink things. Life can be long or short and its definately what you make it. Thats 1 lesson I will never forget from my dad. RIP Toneman....8-11-56 --> 2-20-08 Another note. My father had a car that was his baby. He left it to me to put it back together and hopefully take it to my house and drive occasionally. If you would like to come to my parents house and help with the re-assembly there will be a weekend where a bunch of people are coming for the occasion. His engine builder, business partner, racing buddy's etc... If you would like to come and lend a hand or to just listen to some of the stories about my dad, youre welcome to come out This is the Car!