To Spy or Not to Spy

[reckedracing]

http://www.lenholgate.com/archives/000638.html

so B posted a link to an article regarding google's free wifi endeveaurs...
the next paragraph was about this poor bastard that caught his GF of 17 YEARS talking to some guy regaridng their affair...
i think a story was just shared on here recently in drama boys thread actually...

so this guy set up his network and caught the bitch, they attempted to salvage and fix with a trip to colorado but decided it wasn't gonna work and split up on their return...

i noticed some interesting responses...
you have the guys who sympathize with a "chin up"
then you have the guys who sympathize and have done the same thing with very similar results ie: girls are whores...

then you have douchebags saying he could have done it this way or that way so much easier/more effecient...

then i've noticed some very odd responses along the lines of:
this is immoral
this is illegal
so what if she cheated, you're a creap for spying
and if you didn't trust her then why were you with her etc...

i think someone is downright stupid not to be weary of your significant other cause this shit happens everyday to everyone of us...
i also think most people get these "gut feelings" for a reason and should definately pursue them...
so what do you guys think...

 

[BigJ]

no I would not spy.

My gf constantly logs onto my shit and leaves it logged on.

You know what I do? Log that shit off.

 

[NissanNiNjA2nd]

If you cant trust the other person there isnt a point in being around.

 

[Capt. Orygun]

fuck all that, your only disocvering the truth. Don't think they won't spy on you

 

[Black Widow g2]

and this... another reason why i divorced.


constant spying. when his searches beared no fruit, he'd still yell my head off about it. i'd ask him if he had anything to go on, just his hunch or no? and he'd continue accusing. he swore i was just deleting it.

trust me... spying never helps. if you have an inkling, tell her, if she won't let you look at her shit, she IS lying.

 

[micah]

my g/f logs on my email and my myspace sometimes. she doesnt think i know about it but i do.
its annoying to know that she will do it, but i really dont care or id stop her. i couldnt give a fuck less about spying on her though.
i already told her if she needs to find some strange to keep herself happy then to go for it lol

 

[MikeBergy]

join the cia...

 

[brian11to1]

Quoted post[/post]]
If you cant trust the other person there isnt a point in being around.

exactly...

 

[TurboMirage]

Quoted post[/post]]
and this... another reason why i divorced.


constant spying. when his searches beared no fruit, he'd still yell my head off about it. i'd ask him if he had anything to go on, just his hunch or no? and he'd continue accusing. he swore i was just deleting it.

trust me... spying never helps. if you have an inkling, tell her, if she won't let you look at her shit, she IS lying.

i used to get this, and we would go back and forth trying to uncover hidden secrets that were there... then we broke up. since we got back together, there haven't been any secrets that i know of, and I haven't tried to find any. I know she checks up on me... but thats fine since i have nothing to hide

 

[get_nick]

Quoted post[/post]]
and this... another reason why i divorced.


constant spying. when his searches beared no fruit, he'd still yell my head off about it. i'd ask him if he had anything to go on, just his hunch or no? and he'd continue accusing. he swore i was just deleting it.

trust me... spying never helps. if you have an inkling, tell her, if she won't let you look at her shit, she IS lying.

My gf always accuses me of shit like this. but i'm not doing anything. she checks my phone, my email, and always accuses me of texting or emailing other people. but i'm not and she can't find anything through her snooping around, so it just pisses her off even more.

Quoted post[/post]]
my g/f logs on my email and my myspace sometimes. she doesnt think i know about it but i do.
its annoying to know that she will do it, but i really dont care or id stop her. i couldnt give a fuck less about spying on her though.
i already told her if she needs to find some strange to keep herself happy then to go for it lol

i told my gf to go find something tha makes her happy to. she didn't like that idea and automatically assumed i am going to. i work to much and too hard to have time to cheat. a good woman to me these days will cook dinner, pay some quality attention, and stfu and let me watch a movie before bed. I'm so low maintenence these days.

 

[posol]

anyone who has a GF for 17 years is a fuck up. Marry the bitch already.

 

[Celerity]

Quoted post[/post]]
anyone who has a GF for 17 years is a fuck up. Marry the bitch already.

Excuse me ?

 

[micah]

Quoted post[/post]]
anyone who has a GF for 17 years is a fuck up. Marry the bitch already.

word

hell after 7 years your "considered" married in most states

 

[reckedracing]

hmmm
he was a programmer/coder and she was a lawyer, and neither wanted to get married...
we're missing the issue


and to all the people who replied if there's no trust then there;s no relationship...
what happens when she trusts you and you trust her and then she takes advantage of your trust?

 

[get_nick]

Quoted post[/post]]
hmmm
he was a programmer/coder and she was a lawyer, and neither wanted to get married...
we're missing the issue


and to all the people who replied if there's no trust then there;s no relationship...
what happens when she trusts you and you trust her and then she takes advantage of your trust?

then she's a dumb hooker and she belongs on the curb. I've been there before. they play on the trust to do whatver. I just dont' get why people don't just nut up and say they want to see other people instead of cheating.

 

[reckedracing]

then she's a dumb hooker and she belongs on the curb. I've been there before. they play on the trust to do whatver. I just dont' get why people don't just nut up and say they want to see other people instead of cheating.

its just the way things go

you've got steve's perspective that the weak need a "golden parachute" before they jump
i say they just need another dick to swing from before they jump off yours...

then there's the whole adventure issue with an affair and cheating

i dunno, unfortunately its the way our society is...
more people would rather cheat than fess up and say i'm sick of your cottage cheese nagging ass, get the fuck out...

 

[get_nick]

Quoted post[/post]]

then she's a dumb hooker and she belongs on the curb. I've been there before. they play on the trust to do whatver. I just dont' get why people don't just nut up and say they want to see other people instead of cheating.

its just the way things go

you've got steve's perspective that the weak need a "golden parachute" before they jump
i say they just need another dick to swing from before they jump off yours...

then there's the whole adventure issue with an affair and cheating

i dunno, unfortunately its the way our society is...
more people would rather cheat than fess up and say i'm sick of your cottage cheese nagging ass, get the fuck out...

I guess i can't be one to talk much though. I wanted to break up with my gf because things were going horrible. once i started meeting some new women things with the gf went back to normal. but now i'm left thinking, "what about the other girls". I dont' have to have a reason to break up with her and i don't have a rebound ready, but I think it's kinda fucked after 2 years to just dump her because I want something foreign.

The gf is trying to change. and i remember just how much i use to love her. but that's the thing, its not the same after all the fighting and accusations.

i just need to say, "look woman, i love you but it's not the same as it use to be. you gotta go"
i am always thinking about other girls but i don't act on it.

 

[George777]

I think the problem with most guys is that they get too comfortable with being in a relationship that they realize too late that they aren't IN love that person anymore, they just love them. They don't want to deviate from the "norm" that they have established with their significant other, but they don't want to be involved to the extent they were during the zenith of their relationship...

Fuck the spying...If you can't trust them to tell you what's going on, you can't trust them in a relationship...just grow a set and get rid of em...

 

[Black Widow g2]

that's all chemical now. they say that lovely feeling of 'falling' and being 'in love' is helped out by chemicals in the brain... triggered by the other person.

problem is... that only lasts up to 2 years. so, either way, you'll never 'be in love' forever. it's about how you create that feeling for yourself and understand that you can't just hook em, and expect to keep that feeling forever.

the problem is after that, some people just think it's not worth it anymore.

 

[adnoh]

If you have a hunch that your girlfriend/boyfriend is cheating, then fuck yes, I would COMPLETELY support spying. Because if you don't act on it, it's YOUR fault. If your gf/bf has you in a position where you are going to second guess your gut instinct, then it's obvious who wears the pants.

Lets go with this analogy....

Would you perhaps, check under the hood of a used car when you buy it? Maybe even request a Carfax? Hell, even take it to a mechanic to get it checked out? Of course you would, you do your homework and make an intellegent, educated decision. You don't listen to the salesguy while he blows smoke up your ass trying to get the sale.

Moral: Women are no diffrent (or men for that matter). Do your homework, and make educated decisions. If you think they're being unfaithful than proove it. There is a multitude of resources to find the information you need. Bad things happen to good people ALL the time. What makes people so confident that they think that it would NEVER happen to them? WAKE THE FUCK UP! The fact is that you have NO control over what you significant other does, as much as most people think they do. That is reality.

Trust you ask? Let me ask you guys a question: who do you trust 100%? Your wife/husband? gf/bf? Old friends? Family?

Well, here's my breakdown:
Family 100%
Old guy friends 100%
Wife 80%

Why does the wife only get 80% ?

Because that is ALL the trust I can give her, or any girl that is not family. She gets all the trust I can give, and that is alot because I do love her very much. But relying back to the "if there's no trust, theres no relationship thing" is bullshit. I do trust my wife, with all 80% that I can give. Only blood and trusted guy friends of many years get my full trust.

I think it all boils down to this:

If you think that your gf/bf is cheating and you don't do anything to find out, then you're stupid and too fucking scared of what you might find out.

And just to clear something up, I AM a romantic. I believe very strongly in love and my relationship. But I also dont turn a blind eye to human nature. I love my wife, and she cheated on me. I forgave her (didn't forget), and we are extremely happy now.