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Todays Lame Joke

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by reckedracing, Aug 20, 2010.

  1. reckedracing

    reckedracing TTIWWOP VIP

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    Dec 5, 2002
    A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.
    The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.
    'What do you think you're doing?' asks the wife.
    'They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans he replies.
    'Put them back, we can't afford them demands the wife, and so they carry on shopping.
    A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and putsit in the basket.
    What do you think you're doing?' asks the husband.

    'It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful,' replies the wife.
    Her husband retorts: 'So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price.'

    The Outhouse
    Once there was a little boy who lived in the country. The family had to use

    An outhouse, and the little boy hated it because it was so hot in the summer

    And freezing cold in the winter and stank all the time. The outhouse was sitting on

    The bank of a creek and the boy was determined that one day he would push that old

    Outhouse straight into the creek.

    One day after a spring rain, the creek was swollen so the little boy

    Decided today was the day to push the outhouse into the creek.
    Hefound a large stick and started pushing.
    Finally, the outhouse toppled intothe creek and floated away.

    That night his dad told him they were going to the woodshed aftersupper.
    Knowing that meant a spanking, the little boy asked why.

    The dad replied, "Someone pushed the outhouse into the creek today"
    "It Was you, wasn't it son?"

    The boy answered yes. Then he thought a moment and said, "Dad, I read

    In school today that George Washington chopped down a cherry tree and

    Didn't get into trouble because he told the truth."

    The dad replied, "Well, son, George Washington's father wasn't in the cherry tree.
    Last edited: Aug 20, 2010
  2. jamesA

    jamesA I'm a gun addict now. VIP

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    Aug 10, 2003
    I like the budweiser one, i've heard the outhouse one before though.
  3. Drake

    Drake Well-Known Member VIP

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    Oct 6, 2003
    Those are pretty good ha ha.
  4. Briansol

    Briansol Admins Admin VIP

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    Nov 18, 2007
    Two great white sharks swimming in the ocean spied survivors of a sunken ship. "Follow me son" the father shark said to the son shark and they swam to the mass of people. "First we swim around them a few times with just the tip of our fins showing." And they did. "Well done, son! Now we swim around them a few times with all of our fins showing." And they did. "Now we eat everybody." And they did. When they were both gorged, the son asked,"Dad, why didn't we just eat them all at first? Why did we swim around and around them?" His wise father replied, "Because they taste better without the shit inside!"
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