(09:54:32) ED-: have you heard about our vampire parrots? (09:54:38) Etienne Earl: Ummmmm (09:54:41) Etienne Earl: I would say no (09:54:54) ED-: they attack sheep and eat the fat around their kidneys (09:55:02) Etienne Earl: Link, please (09:55:02) ED-: while they're still alive (09:55:05) ED-: This, of course, already happens to our famous kea: the mountain parrot. An entertaining bird, much admired for its plumage and cheeky disposition. However, high country farmers somewhat less admire it. The kea developed a taste for the fat surrounding the kidney of a sheep. After an attack, blood poisoning would inevitably kill the sheep. The farmer inevitably would kill the kea, but consider this: the sheep is worth at best $150, the kea to a bird fancier in Europe: $30,000. (09:55:31) ED-: I had to sift through some asshole's speech to find that (09:55:34) Etienne Earl: "Cheeky disposition" (09:55:45) ED-: yeah (09:55:47) Etienne Earl: "You cheeky bastard" (09:55:58) ED-: if you park your car up at a ski-field (09:56:01) ED-: they literally take it apart (09:56:09) Etienne Earl: who ? the birds ? (09:56:13) ED-: yup (09:56:27) ED-: they're big green parrots that have the IQ of a 5 year old (09:56:46) ED-: you come back and you might as well ahve parked in the bronx (09:57:10) Etienne Earl: Kea - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia (09:57:14) ED-: they pull off the aerials, doorhandles, radiator grille (if you have one), the seal around the windscreen (09:58:28) ED-: if I could get these to europe (09:58:34) Etienne Earl: they are protected species ?! (09:58:43) Etienne Earl: I would unleash them on Europe (09:58:44) ED-: well you're not supposed to shoot them (09:59:27) ED-: so yes, they're protected. most things should be except the introduced pests (10:00:19) Etienne Earl: it's funny to see Parrots in snow (10:00:26) Etienne Earl: our Parrots started from domestics (10:00:29) Etienne Earl: and are alien here (10:00:34) Etienne Earl: they aren't pests though (10:00:43) ED-: these ones live in the snow as far as I'm aware (10:00:57) ED-: tehy're big (10:01:00) ED-: and walk like creeps (10:01:06) Etienne Earl: I wonder if you can teach them to talk as well (10:01:28) Etienne Earl: "I'm gonna cut you" "I'll fuck you up" "Give me the keys!" (10:01:36) ED-: I'd say it'd be easy if you got a baby one (10:01:38) ED-: heheheh (10:02:02) Etienne Earl: train about 20 of them with threats and euphamisms, let them go in the wild to continue their knowledge (10:02:23) Etienne Earl: give them enough broken english to threaten people's lives and buy concert tickets (10:03:02) Etienne Earl: because Moby needs to be mauled by a group of ill-tempered - nay - "Cheeky Disposition" Parrots (10:04:15) ED-: the whole mugging aspect is a pretty good idea (10:04:21) ED-: they could also scalp the tickets (10:04:58) Etienne Earl: "Hey, arsehole... why pay for those tickets" (10:04:59) Etienne Earl: "meatbag" (10:05:11) Etienne Earl: "Yo niggah got a sheep I can hold?" (10:05:38) ED-: "hold" (10:05:52) Etienne Earl: All ebonics are 100x funnier when spoken in Parrot screeches and whistles (10:05:59) ED-: talk about a euphemism (10:06:20) ED-: my cockatiel never said a word (10:06:23) ED-: up until the age of 12 (10:06:32) Etienne Earl: when he finally learned "Hey, you smell gas" (10:07:00) ED-: ahah. no, his final demise was a cat who climbed in through a window (10:07:19) ED-: he survived 3 near drownings and a fractured leg (10:07:30) Etienne Earl: "OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT OH SHIT <Muffled screeching><MUFFLED whistling>" (10:08:10) ED-: the $400 green parrot that my youngest brother had spoke garbled nonsense (10:08:11) Etienne Earl: "ED! CRAWWWWK ! I TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT FUCKIN CAT ! SQWAU !" (10:08:25) ED-: that was traumatic! (10:08:27) Etienne Earl: and Bjork was there to pick up the pieces (10:08:53) ED-: jose cuervo was (10:08:58) Etienne Earl: "OH this accident that happpeneed follow the dots! Coincidence! Makes sense ! Only with YOOOO OOO WOOO" (10:09:19) Etienne Earl: "SQUAWK!" (10:09:25) ED-: I've onyl got one of her albums (10:09:55) Etienne Earl: "Big time senusality!" " CAW" (10:10:01) ED-: a lot of them are too harpie sounding (10:10:27) Etienne Earl: I can picture Bjork perched ontop of a car pulling the window gaskets out with her beak (10:10:45) Etienne Earl: flashing nasty looks when the owner comes back (10:11:11) Etienne Earl: "MEATBAG! SQUAWK !" "CAW ! Where's Moby?!"