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what do you guys think?

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by Dustin_m, May 15, 2006.

  1. Dustin_m

    Dustin_m Active Member

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    alright so i need some advice/opinions on what i should do right now.

    ok, so theres a girl in my architecture class that i like. i started talking to her a few weeks back and we hit it off great. we were both here all night workingon projects and we talked all damn night about so much stuff and really get along great. judging by what i know so far, her pesonality and views an stuff is totally what i would want in a girl.

    now comes the problems. theres another guy in the class that likes her. i didn't know that until i told him one day to introduce us, because i know he talked to her, and i had never talked to her at all. when i asked him that he said they were actually talking and stuff. well so at that point i just was like oh ok, so i backed off. well i ended up talking to her that night we were both here and all that. so fast forward like two weeks to saturday night, this last weekend. i had told her earlier i wanted to have a party of a get together at my house and she had said she wanted to come. so saturday i was having a party but didn't have her number to call her, and she wasn't in class the day before. so on saturday one of my other friends, pancho, calls me to get directions to my house and says he has a friend with him, not telling me it was her. this guy knows her through the guy who said he's talking to her. so they get ther and its her thats with him, so shes all happy to be there and all.

    well me and like 4 of my friends pretty much stayed in my room bullshitting and playing drinking games. she stayed on the couch with me the whole time and we were talking throughout the night. i ended up asking her straight up if they were talking and she was surprised and said no. she didn't know that he had said that i guess and was kinda pissed about it. so whatever, we stayed up all night and at one point, we were taling and without even saying anything we kissed. so yea, nothing else happened, which is ok, cause if i really wanted to just get some ass that night, i could have just went out to where everyone else was at.

    so i am gonna skip the other drama that had to do with the party which was many noise complaints because of the mud wrestling outside (i'll put pics up when i get em from my roommates :) ), police everywhere without a warrant and me telling them to get out. all kinds of shit happened.

    so in the morning she left, we kissed again right before, and ya thats it.

    now today i called her to se if she was at school yet and it turns out the guy that brought her told the other one about what happened, which i knew would happen. supposedly he called her and was being all dramtic about. so i haven't talked to her anymore today.

    now i just don't even know if i want to pursue it. on one hand i really do like the girl, and we get along great. on the other i know this dude is just gonna be a pain in the ass either way. i mean, he is kind of a friend, and so is the guy that brought this girl to my house, we go out sometimes to take a break during long nights at school and shit.

    yea i don't know how much sense this whole post makes, jsut kind of mixed up right now. you know, when you get a knot in your stomach because something happens and you can't really do anything about it right then, just have to wait.

    what i have thought about is just waiting it out until the next time i see her then talk about it. that idea sucks because, for one, this dude will not leave her alone, especially with me becasue he doesn't want me to talk to her, which is fuckin lame and insecure. also i hate waiting for shit. the other thing i thought about doing is just calling her tonight and talking about it. i just want to ask basically whats up, let hre kow i like her a lot, and let her decide. i'm not the type to chase after and bug someone to go out with me, but i just want to be able to know that i said how i felt and let her figure out what she wants. i have seen how she acts to him and even a couple other guys in class say she acts totally different to me, like she is really into me, and that she doesn't act that way to him.

    i don't know, what do you guys think?
     
  2. shortbusrebel07

    shortbusrebel07 Senior Member

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    if you like her as much as you say you do then dont let her get away. if she is a great person to hang out with then i say go for it. if you want too long you will fall into the "just friends" catagory.
     
  3. SlushboxTeggy

    SlushboxTeggy It's only stupid if it doesn't work VIP

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    That has happened to me before. Basically he told you they were talking, even though they weren't, to try and "call" her. Unfortunately "calling" shit only works when it comes to shotgun in the car. He is an idiot for thinking you wouldn't ask her about it. Go for it. Especially if this dude is "kind of" friend.

    Back when I was single I had a friend that would always try to "call" girls, like, "she's mine, ok?". I would say yea and even if I had no intention of going after her I would. And I pretty much always won too.

    Most of the time when a guy does that it means his game sucks or he thinks it does. When you continue to pursue they get flustered, panicky, and try to secure the girl right then and there and ussually fuck themselves. Leaving you to go at your own pace. So like I said, pursue as if he wasn't in the picture.
     
  4. Celerity

    Celerity Well-Known Member

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    Hahaha... the persective I have on this shit is SO different now than it was when I Was younger.

    But Cel advice: Go for it. This sounds like a quality girl, and if that dude wants to be a pain in the ass about it, he's not a quality friend. Male or Female, you gotta choose quality over anything else.

    I don't think she's playing games. When girls play games, they don't converse - they agree with everything you say. If you had an actual conversation with her, then she wasn't putting on a show or trying to get anything. Thats rare.

    My take on it: Go for this one. If the dude freaks out, then everyone will (For a fleeting moment) know and show their colors. Takes the guess work out of everything. This is one of those situations that will lay out all of the cards on the table.

    -> Steve
     
  5. Dustin_m

    Dustin_m Active Member

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    yea thats pretty much the way i saw it, that he is being fuckin insecure, and knows he probably couldn't compete with the fact that she likes me, so he was trying to buy time, maybe to try to convince her to be with him maybe. i don't know, but now that she knows whats up, i don't think he's buying time anymore.

    the thing i am stuck on is. do you guys think i should call her tonight and talk or wait it out till she says something. i know most girls wouldn't ever bring up the subject, but i got a good feeling this girl would bring it up to me. i just don't want to wait too long and screw myself over.

    also if i wait too long, i think she might think i regretted something, or that i was trashed and now i'm embarrassed to talk about what happen (which wasn't the case at all)
     
  6. High_Rolling_Civic

    High_Rolling_Civic Member

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    well, as for choosing whether waiting to have her bring it up or to call, i say call. Hell, tell her how you feel, sounds like shes into you and all. I mean, you dont list anything wrong with calling her asap, but you do list things bad about not calling. one has no disadvantages(that you feel are worth pointing out) and the other has some, so go with the one that has none. good luck man.
     
  7. Dustin_m

    Dustin_m Active Member

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    ha, i didn't realize that i said no drawbacks to actually calling. i guess the only one would be that i end up bugging her or whatever, but if you're really into someone you want them to call, so if she gets annoyed then it wasn't menat to be.

    thats funny that something as obvious as what i wrote didn't even click in my brain :p

    I'm staying late at school tonight hoping she comes in later because i know she has a project due. and i know that assclown chasing after her has to work tonight.


    oh yea, do you guys remember like a couple months ago i met some chick from my hometown that i started going out with? well if you do, yea, she turned out to be a HOE. big time, i can't remember if i posted about it. yea, she told me all this bullshit, because she thought she could get away with it since we had never talked before, ahha, i found out it was all lies. fuckin whore, she had screwed so many fuckin guys, like seriously it turned out a few friends had fucked her and everything. ughh, good riddance.
     
  8. MugenCRX

    MugenCRX Senior Member

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    Call her. But don't talk about it over the phone, invite her out somewhere. Whatever you do, do it in person, much greater impact that way!

    GO GET EM TIGER!!!
     
  9. Celerity

    Celerity Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, you told us about that. Uncle Cel was right about that one.

    As far as the "in person" thing, I'm totally on board with that. Don't do it over the phone.
     
  10. Dustin_m

    Dustin_m Active Member

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    haha, i guess i might find out in a few minutes whats up. my other friend who was at my house on saturday got her number(not in that way though) and i guess she called yesterday, so i told him to call her back, then try to find out whats up, without saying too much.

    yea i am being a pussy about it, whatever
     
  11. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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    [ot]I love this name. it's like a white guy naming his kid Umbrella
    [/ot]

    lol

    anyway, back to the lecture at hand....


    I had a similar situation my fresh year of college.

    ...and I still kick myself in the ass for letting her get away (I met her a couple weeks before finals, and she transferred schools... never saw her again after finals.)

    Don't let her get away.

    She obviously likes you. Just be your self, and hang out from time to time, and everything will fall into place.

    No.

    Don't even talk about it. That guy doesn't exist in your world. it's you and her.

    No. Never make a woman make a tough decision. lol Seriously though, if you make her chose on the spot, she'll get all depressed :i don't know, blah blah blah," and it won't go anywhere.

    Just be your self. Call her to talk to her to get to know her, not to make everything a problem.
    Take her out for coffee... or whatever. Small things mean a lot to chicks. Spend time with her because you WANT to. And while you're doing it, be interested in learning about her... what her intrests are, who she rolls with /biggie

    you will NEVER figure out what a woman wants. Ever. Hell, they don't even know.

    you are WAY too early in yoru relationship to be dumping a load (figuratively :p ) on her chest and making her deal with it. If you want to win her heart, make her forget all about everything else when ever you are with her or talk to her.

    She likes you. it's obvious. She made it obvious. Now stop being a pussy and go out there and talk with her about meaningless shit like the stars and what you want to be when you grow up-- not about some douche bag dude from class.


    From,
    Brian, who hasn't had a date in 5 years. lol
     
  12. Dustin_m

    Dustin_m Active Member

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    [​IMG] haha i'm just as bad at it. look, i'm on a car site, asking a bunch of guys who are practically more into their rides than girls, for girl advice :p


    oh and pancho is the nickname, his real name is francisco. its like nacho, its short for ignacio.

    yea theres some funny ass nicknames in spanish

    FUCK YES, guess who just walked into class, haha

    wish me luck dammit
     
  13. TurboMirage

    TurboMirage YEEAAAHHH VIP

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    follow her home, wear white gloves, and strangle her ass.

    then leave.
     
  14. Seany-izzle

    Seany-izzle New Member

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  15. Dustin_m

    Dustin_m Active Member

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  16. Citizen_Insane

    Citizen_Insane Senior Member

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    [​IMG] best advice EVER :ph34r:
     
  17. SlushboxTeggy

    SlushboxTeggy It's only stupid if it doesn't work VIP

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    Best Advice In The Thread.

    What I would do:
    Tell her you want to cook for her then watch a movie. Let her pick it. Under no circumstances make any sort of move all night. If she does then fine, but again don't make a move before she does. If she kisses you, don't try to feel her up, etc. But just a nice night were you don't try to fuck her will make her feel even better about you. I guess you could look at it as a "setup", but I like to look at it as a nice guy turning the charm up.

    P.S.-I have used that move more than once and it has a success rate of 100%.
     
  18. Dustin_m

    Dustin_m Active Member

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    alright, so i just got home from school. She ended up coming in at whatever time i opsted that last post. we sat there working all night, and mostly just talking. everything is pretty much sorted out, and its all in my favor. she says she pretty much has lost respect for the other guy, since he tried to basically claim her like property. she said it straight up that shes really into me and all that. also said i she remembers the kiss and that it was great, so that was a big plus for me. Me and her are totally on the same page about relationships, as we both just got out of about a 5 year relationship. basically she says she is still getting over it, but she kept hinting, well mroe than hinting, but not saying it directly, that she is willing to date someone thats worth it if it happens. i ended up saying straight out that even though she might be straight out of the relationship and all, i didn't want to let her get away, so i wanted her to atleast know how i feel so far about her, she took that really good. umm, yea so basically we talked all night. she also told me she likes spending time with me because she's never really had someone that can hold a deep convo with her, and she thinks thats something important.

    and one cool ass thing to top it off, she surfs, and i just got my first board, so she's gonna take me out surfing now. well i'm going today for the first time with another friend from class, but she said as soon as we get a chance we are going to go together.

    so yea everythings great, and i guess that guy didn't trip out as bad as i thought, i guess he more or less just got his feelings hurt and was a little bitter about it. but he was still cool enough to say i should have came with them when a few of them all went to the art supply store today,or yesterday i should say.


    oh yea, she's 25. i saved posting that till now becasue i figured some of you might change your opinion possibly just because she's 4 years older.
     
  19. reckedracing

    reckedracing TTIWWOP VIP

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    [​IMG]
    an older chick might do your ass some good, forget about those young bimbos
     
  20. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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    didin't i tell you NOT to do any of that? lol
     
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