Well, I took a trip to Raleigh, NC to visit a bunch of my friends to celebrate my 21st bday (actually on Halloween) this weekend and it went a little something like this:
6PM
It all started when we all (me, ex girlfriend Shayna, & about 5 other friends) pre-gamed at Shaynas house. We purchased two cases and sucked those down as fast as possible, so everyone had about 6 or so beers in them. Decent Start.
During this time, we are just shooting the shit and waiting for parties to begin. We finish off the beer, and everyone starts to get their costumes together. Me and all of my friends finish dressing, and we become our new identities, which are as followes:Hockey Player from Hell (me), the Pirate (blake), the Pirates mistress (shayna), the French Maid (aubrey), the Lepracaun (mike), Quagmeyer (tim), Heirmeidy (sp? - from Harry Potter, emily) and the Black Angel of Death (meggan). Once we have transformed, we are off to the party, all feeling pretty good.
9PM
We arrive at the first party, and it is just reaching its prime. The party consists of two floors of 8 adjacent apartments. The top floor being heaven, and the bottom floor being Hell. As we made our way down to Hell, a red light blanketed everyone who entered. We find our way to the "cup man" and purchase our cups, and make our way to one of the 4 kegs tapped at the time. Here we meet up with Freddy Kruger and Fat Pregnent Cheerleader. Times were great, and me and Quagmeyer manned the keg, spitting out various Quagmeyer quotes to hot girls who wanted to fill their cups. Ignoring various people who negatively commented on my Red Wings jersey. Although I do give them credit for being brave enough to insult the man in charge of the beer.
10PM
The cops show up and try to keep things somewhat civil. Upon trying to find the owner of the apartments that had kegs in them, a person dumped a full beer onto one of the cops head's from the second floor. He was not pleased. However, the cop never found the Lepracaun because he was hiding in the closet, and there was too many people and too much going on to search all the rooms of every apartment. They didn't have very much authority since they were dealing with such a large crowd, seeing how people were filling their cups up even when the cops were shining their flashlights all over the place. So I guess they just decided to leave, and figured it just wasn't worth it.
11PM
The kegs run dry, so we decided to mirgrate. No alcohol, no party. So we move to another party nearby and are blown away. The party consisted of a chain of 3 houses next to each other. One house had 3 kegs of Miller High Life (ew), the second house had 3 kegs of Honey Brown, and the third house had 3 enormous tubs of Everclear PJ. Me and the Pirate head straight to the third house, thirsty for some everclear. Not a good idea. Everything is going great so far. Later, not wanting to get too smashed from PJ, I get to the front of the keg waiting line, and the owner of the house, Zeus. Being a hockey fan himself, he is impressed with my costume. So he tells me too take over for him, because he has something else more important to do (which I later find out is buy more kegs). In control of the beer flow, and being able to fill up my cup at any point. Yes, please.
12AM
People now start to feel the effects of the alcohol, and everyone is in a straight up drunken orgy of people. The pirate and Heirmeidy are fighting, wand versus pirate hook. Quagmeyer and the Frenchmaid hook up in one of the rooms (surprise, surprise). I am still manning the keg, and the Black Angel of Death comes up to me and asks to do a kegstand. I tell her, well, you gotta find people to lift you cause my two hands are taken: keg nozzle in one hand, beer in the other. She eventually finds two guys and we proceed to doing the kegstand. She lasted about 3 seconds, and maybe got some down the wrong hole. But anyways, she then vomits all over the top of the keg. Lets just say, people went next door. The only smart one of the night was the Lepracaun, who cut himself off here, because he was the DD. Smart move indeed.
1AM
The drunken pirates mistress and I catch up, and she starts to re-energize her feelings for me. I'm thinking, "Im only in town until the morning, so I can have sex with her and not have to worry about the morning after bullshit." So I take action and we hook up in the bed next to where Quagmeyer and the Frenchmaid are passed out (pussies, I know). After we finish, we realize that the door to the room had been open the entire time. Whoops. Oh well, free peep show for pervs.
2AM
The PJ is cashed, and only 1 keg remains of the original 6+. The lepracaun is sober in a nightmare of drunken morons, so he wants to leave. When he goes around and gives everyone their ultimatum, I decide to stay. Bad choice. And to make it even worse, the only keg remaining was Miller High Life. Disgusted by the thought of having to drink MHL, I ask the Black Guy, who was a friend of a friend to buy me beer. He says that he doesn't buy beer for people, so I give him a proposition that i'll buy beer for him in exchange for a ride home. Win, win situation.
3AM
After my alochol is brought to me and consumed, the party had pretty much died down and I figured it was time to leave. Searching through all three 3 houses, and I couldn't find the Black Guy anywhere. It was like he had vanished like a fart in the wind. My temper is running wild, and i'm as drunk as hell. Not a good combination. I end up getting in a fight with some guy who no apparant reason. I am told to leave and have no way of getting home, at 3 in the morning, a good 20 minutes from where i'm staying. Fucked over by the Black Man.
4AM
This is where things start to get fuzzy. With no other choice, I start walking towards where i'm staying. Now, I can barely walk a straight line, let alone ~20 miles. After about three or so miles of walking, I flag down a cab. However, I have 0 dollars in my wallet. The whole ride home, I am talking to the cabbie, who just so happeneds to be a black guy. That's when this masterful (at the time in my drunken stupor) plan occurs to me. I talk him up saying I'll give him a fat tip, but my money is inside my house. He seems please about the situation, and I tell him that my house is one that is really in a cul-da-sac adajcent to where i'm staying. I get out of the car, walk towards the door, then all of a sudden, I just BOLT. Somehow, I successfully make it to where i'm staying, and thank god, the door was unlocked. Because homeboy in the cab was blazing tires attempting to follow me. I peeked through the blinds, and he was on the same street as I was and looking between the gaps in the houses. I made it home. Barely. Even though the Black Man was probably laughing at me, because earlier he got free beer out of the deal, I was the one laughing now. Then, I pretty much laughed myself to sleep.
Pictures will be coming shortly.
Parties attended: 2
Estimated beers/drinks: ~25
Estimated Kegs consumed: 12
Girls I fucked: 1
Times I threw up: 0 (very proud of this one)
Miles I walked: 3
Dollars I paid for the cab: $0
Getting payback on the black man: Priceless.
Note: My story is by no way trying to be racist. They could have been asain, pakistan, or whatever race. I am not trying to be condescending in any form or fashion. It just so happens that both the guy who fucked me over, and the cabbie both happened to be black. Coincidence, pure coincidence.
6PM
It all started when we all (me, ex girlfriend Shayna, & about 5 other friends) pre-gamed at Shaynas house. We purchased two cases and sucked those down as fast as possible, so everyone had about 6 or so beers in them. Decent Start.
During this time, we are just shooting the shit and waiting for parties to begin. We finish off the beer, and everyone starts to get their costumes together. Me and all of my friends finish dressing, and we become our new identities, which are as followes:Hockey Player from Hell (me), the Pirate (blake), the Pirates mistress (shayna), the French Maid (aubrey), the Lepracaun (mike), Quagmeyer (tim), Heirmeidy (sp? - from Harry Potter, emily) and the Black Angel of Death (meggan). Once we have transformed, we are off to the party, all feeling pretty good.
9PM
We arrive at the first party, and it is just reaching its prime. The party consists of two floors of 8 adjacent apartments. The top floor being heaven, and the bottom floor being Hell. As we made our way down to Hell, a red light blanketed everyone who entered. We find our way to the "cup man" and purchase our cups, and make our way to one of the 4 kegs tapped at the time. Here we meet up with Freddy Kruger and Fat Pregnent Cheerleader. Times were great, and me and Quagmeyer manned the keg, spitting out various Quagmeyer quotes to hot girls who wanted to fill their cups. Ignoring various people who negatively commented on my Red Wings jersey. Although I do give them credit for being brave enough to insult the man in charge of the beer.
10PM
The cops show up and try to keep things somewhat civil. Upon trying to find the owner of the apartments that had kegs in them, a person dumped a full beer onto one of the cops head's from the second floor. He was not pleased. However, the cop never found the Lepracaun because he was hiding in the closet, and there was too many people and too much going on to search all the rooms of every apartment. They didn't have very much authority since they were dealing with such a large crowd, seeing how people were filling their cups up even when the cops were shining their flashlights all over the place. So I guess they just decided to leave, and figured it just wasn't worth it.
11PM
The kegs run dry, so we decided to mirgrate. No alcohol, no party. So we move to another party nearby and are blown away. The party consisted of a chain of 3 houses next to each other. One house had 3 kegs of Miller High Life (ew), the second house had 3 kegs of Honey Brown, and the third house had 3 enormous tubs of Everclear PJ. Me and the Pirate head straight to the third house, thirsty for some everclear. Not a good idea. Everything is going great so far. Later, not wanting to get too smashed from PJ, I get to the front of the keg waiting line, and the owner of the house, Zeus. Being a hockey fan himself, he is impressed with my costume. So he tells me too take over for him, because he has something else more important to do (which I later find out is buy more kegs). In control of the beer flow, and being able to fill up my cup at any point. Yes, please.
12AM
People now start to feel the effects of the alcohol, and everyone is in a straight up drunken orgy of people. The pirate and Heirmeidy are fighting, wand versus pirate hook. Quagmeyer and the Frenchmaid hook up in one of the rooms (surprise, surprise). I am still manning the keg, and the Black Angel of Death comes up to me and asks to do a kegstand. I tell her, well, you gotta find people to lift you cause my two hands are taken: keg nozzle in one hand, beer in the other. She eventually finds two guys and we proceed to doing the kegstand. She lasted about 3 seconds, and maybe got some down the wrong hole. But anyways, she then vomits all over the top of the keg. Lets just say, people went next door. The only smart one of the night was the Lepracaun, who cut himself off here, because he was the DD. Smart move indeed.
1AM
The drunken pirates mistress and I catch up, and she starts to re-energize her feelings for me. I'm thinking, "Im only in town until the morning, so I can have sex with her and not have to worry about the morning after bullshit." So I take action and we hook up in the bed next to where Quagmeyer and the Frenchmaid are passed out (pussies, I know). After we finish, we realize that the door to the room had been open the entire time. Whoops. Oh well, free peep show for pervs.
2AM
The PJ is cashed, and only 1 keg remains of the original 6+. The lepracaun is sober in a nightmare of drunken morons, so he wants to leave. When he goes around and gives everyone their ultimatum, I decide to stay. Bad choice. And to make it even worse, the only keg remaining was Miller High Life. Disgusted by the thought of having to drink MHL, I ask the Black Guy, who was a friend of a friend to buy me beer. He says that he doesn't buy beer for people, so I give him a proposition that i'll buy beer for him in exchange for a ride home. Win, win situation.
3AM
After my alochol is brought to me and consumed, the party had pretty much died down and I figured it was time to leave. Searching through all three 3 houses, and I couldn't find the Black Guy anywhere. It was like he had vanished like a fart in the wind. My temper is running wild, and i'm as drunk as hell. Not a good combination. I end up getting in a fight with some guy who no apparant reason. I am told to leave and have no way of getting home, at 3 in the morning, a good 20 minutes from where i'm staying. Fucked over by the Black Man.
4AM
This is where things start to get fuzzy. With no other choice, I start walking towards where i'm staying. Now, I can barely walk a straight line, let alone ~20 miles. After about three or so miles of walking, I flag down a cab. However, I have 0 dollars in my wallet. The whole ride home, I am talking to the cabbie, who just so happeneds to be a black guy. That's when this masterful (at the time in my drunken stupor) plan occurs to me. I talk him up saying I'll give him a fat tip, but my money is inside my house. He seems please about the situation, and I tell him that my house is one that is really in a cul-da-sac adajcent to where i'm staying. I get out of the car, walk towards the door, then all of a sudden, I just BOLT. Somehow, I successfully make it to where i'm staying, and thank god, the door was unlocked. Because homeboy in the cab was blazing tires attempting to follow me. I peeked through the blinds, and he was on the same street as I was and looking between the gaps in the houses. I made it home. Barely. Even though the Black Man was probably laughing at me, because earlier he got free beer out of the deal, I was the one laughing now. Then, I pretty much laughed myself to sleep.
Pictures will be coming shortly.
Parties attended: 2
Estimated beers/drinks: ~25
Estimated Kegs consumed: 12
Girls I fucked: 1
Times I threw up: 0 (very proud of this one)
Miles I walked: 3
Dollars I paid for the cab: $0
Getting payback on the black man: Priceless.
Note: My story is by no way trying to be racist. They could have been asain, pakistan, or whatever race. I am not trying to be condescending in any form or fashion. It just so happens that both the guy who fucked me over, and the cabbie both happened to be black. Coincidence, pure coincidence.