The Perfect Quarterback

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I'm just about that action Boss.
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Oakland Raiders.
The only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had
scouted all the colleges, and even the high schools, but he couldn't
find a ringer quarterback who could ensure a Super Bowl win.

Then one night, while watching CNN, he saw a war-zone scene in
Afghanistan. In one corner of the background, he spotted a young
Afghanistan soldier with a truly incredible arm.

He threw a hand grenade straight into a 3rd story window 200 yards
away, ka-boom!

He threw another hand grenade into a group of 10 soldiers 100 yards
away, ka-blooey!

Then a car passed, going 90 mph, bulls-eye!

"I've got to get this guy!" Said the coach to himself. "HE has the
perfect arm!"

So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of
football. The Raiders go on to win yet another Super Bowl and Al
Davis is very happy...

The young Afghani is hailed as the Great Hero of football, and when
Coach asks him what he wants, all the young man wants to do is to call
his mother.

"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Superbowl!"

I just got this from my mom, it owns all

"I don't want to talk to you," the old woman says. "You deserted
us. You are not my son."

"I don't think you understand, Mother!" the young man pleads. "I just
won the greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands
of my adoring fans."

"No, let me tell you," his mother retorts. "At this very moment,
there are gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of
rubble. Your two brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives
last week, and this week your sister was raped in broad daylight."

The old lady pauses, and then tearfully says, "...I'll never
forgive you for making us move to Oakland."