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Dumb people and dumb warnings

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by nootrac22, Dec 14, 2007.

  1. nootrac22

    nootrac22 Well-Known Member VIP

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    http://www.wackywarnings.com/

    DETROIT (AP) - Words to live by, from a warning label on a small tractor: "Danger: Avoid Death." That warning was selected Wednesday as the winner of the 11th annual "Wacky Warning Label Contest," sponsored by Michigan Lawsuit Abuse Watch. The contest is part of an effort to show the effects of lawsuits on warning labels.
    Kevin Soave of Farmington Hills, a Detroit suburb, won the $500 grand prize for submitting the tractor's "Danger: Avoid Death" label.
    The $250 second place was given to Carrianne, Jacob and Robby Turin of Greensburg, Pa., for a label they found on an iron-on T-shirt transfer that warns: "Do not iron while wearing shirt." Richard Goodnow of Lancaster, Mass., earned the $100 third-place prize for a label on a baby stroller featuring a small storage pouch that warns: "Do not put child in bag."Contest organizer Bob Dorigo Jones says the silly labels reflect how broken America's civil justice system is.

    "Predatory lawyers know they can file ridiculous lawsuits against innocent product makers and blackmail them into a cash settlement - even in cases in which a user has ignored common sense," Dorigo Jones said in a statement Wednesday.
    Honorable mention went to Cyndi LaMonde of Traverse City for a label on a letter opener that says: "Caution: Safety goggles recommended."
    Ann Marie Young of Fillmore, N.Y., took the second honorable mention for a warning she found which cautions users: "The Vanishing Fabric Marker should not be used as a writing instrument for signing checks or any legal documents." The group selected a list of finalists and listeners of WOMC-FM's Dick Purtan show chose the winners
     
  2. nootrac22

    nootrac22 Well-Known Member VIP

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    Following is a list of some of the best labels from the first eight contests:
    [FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]
    [​IMG]A label on a baby stroller warns: “Remove child before folding
    [​IMG]A brass fishing lure with a three-pronged hook on the end warns: “Harmful if swallowed
    [​IMG]A popular scooter for children warns: "This product moves when used."
    [​IMG]A nine- by three-inch bag of air used as packing material cautions: "Do not use this product as a toy, pillow, or flotation device."
    [​IMG]A flushable toilet brush warns: "Do not use for personal hygiene."
    [​IMG]The label on an electric hand blender promoted for use in "blending, whipping, chopping and dicing," warns: "Never remove food or other items from the blades while the product is operating."
    [​IMG]A digital thermometer that can be used to take a person's temperature several different ways warns: "Once used rectally, the thermometer should not be used orally."
    [​IMG]A household iron warns users: “Never iron clothes while they are being worn”
    [​IMG]A label on a hair dryer reads, “Never use hair dryer while sleeping”
    [​IMG]A warning on an electric drill made for carpenters cautions: “This product not intended for use as a dental drill.”
    [​IMG]The label on a bottle of drain cleaner warns: “If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions, cautions and warnings, do not use this product.”
    [​IMG]A smoke detector warns: “Do not use the Silence Feature in emergency situations. It will not extinguish a fire.”
    [​IMG]A massage chair warns: “DO NOT use massage chair without clothing... and, Never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving.”
    [​IMG]A cardboard car sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard warns, “Do not drive with sunshield in place”
    [​IMG]An “Aim-n-Flame” fireplace lighter cautions, “Do not use near fire, flame or sparks”
    [​IMG]A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use “while sleeping or unconscious”
    [​IMG]A 12-inch rack for storing compact disks warns: “Do not use as a ladder.”
    [​IMG]A cartridge for a laser printer warns, “Do not eat toner”
    [​IMG]A 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow warns: “Not intended for highway use”
    [​IMG]A can of self-defense pepper spray warns users: “May irritate eyes”
    [​IMG]A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists says: “Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.”
    [​IMG]A snowblower warns: “Do not use snowthrower on roof.”
    [​IMG]A dishwasher carries this warning: “Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher.”
    [​IMG]A popular manufactured fireplace log warns: “Caution - Risk of Fire”
    [​IMG]A box of birthday cake candles says: “DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity.”
    [/FONT]
     
  3. Cashizslick

    Cashizslick !i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!

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  4. E_SolSi

    E_SolSi Member of the 20 nut club Moderator VIP

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    :werd: that about covers it
     
  5. Celerity

    Celerity Well-Known Member

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    No fixin' stupid.
     
  6. MadMaXXX

    MadMaXXX Mad Man

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    the fishing lure one is the best but if people are that stupid it needs to be more specific and state that humans should not swallow it

    duh, if fish swallow da loor then I be harmed! nooes fishing why?
     
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