civicgirlracer97
Banned
This was sent to me in email and I thought it would be a good laugh for you guys. 
Having A Bad Day
There was a condition in one hospital's intensive care ward
where patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning,
at about 11 A.M., regardless of their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had
something to do with the supernatural.
No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred
around 11 A.M.on Sundays. So a worldwide team of experts
was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents.
The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11 A.M.,
all the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward
to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about.
Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and
other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits.
Just when the clock struck 11 A.M., Pookie Johnson, the part-time
Sunday janitor, entered the ward and unplugged the life support
system so that he could plug in the vacuum cleaner.
Having a bad day? . . .
The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez
oil spill in Alaskawas $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the
most expensively saved animals were being released back into
the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers.
A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.
Still think you are having a bad day??. . .
A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking
frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire
running from his waist towards the electric kettle.
Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current,
she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking
his arm in two places.
Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.
STILL think you're having a bad day???. . .
Two animal rights protesters were protesting the cruelty of
sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany.
Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped
through a broken fence, stampeding madly.
The two hopeless protesters were trampled to death.
WHAT!! You're STILL having a bad day???? . . .
Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a
letter bomb. It came back with, "return to sender" stamped on it.
Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.
There now, feeling better?
Having A Bad Day
There was a condition in one hospital's intensive care ward
where patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning,
at about 11 A.M., regardless of their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had
something to do with the supernatural.
No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred
around 11 A.M.on Sundays. So a worldwide team of experts
was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents.
The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11 A.M.,
all the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward
to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about.
Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books and
other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits.
Just when the clock struck 11 A.M., Pookie Johnson, the part-time
Sunday janitor, entered the ward and unplugged the life support
system so that he could plug in the vacuum cleaner.
Having a bad day? . . .
The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez
oil spill in Alaskawas $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the
most expensively saved animals were being released back into
the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers.
A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.
Still think you are having a bad day??. . .
A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking
frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire
running from his waist towards the electric kettle.
Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current,
she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking
his arm in two places.
Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.
STILL think you're having a bad day???. . .
Two animal rights protesters were protesting the cruelty of
sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany.
Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped
through a broken fence, stampeding madly.
The two hopeless protesters were trampled to death.
WHAT!! You're STILL having a bad day???? . . .
Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a
letter bomb. It came back with, "return to sender" stamped on it.
Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits.
There now, feeling better?
(cough)
Very funny!
I haven't had anything bad happen to me in a while. Only thing lately is I started college on monday, so I'm damn tired in the morning!
