lame joke of the day

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P

posol

RETIRED
A mailman decided to take early retirement. When the small community he worked in found out, they decided they should do something nice since he served them for all these years.
So, the last day on the job, the mailman went up to the first house, and the home owner welcomed him in, they gave him a pile of gifts and thanked him for services well done.
At the second house, they gave him a cheque for $100, and the third house, a cheque for $200.
At the next house, a well endowed blond answers the door. She is wearing the sheerest of pajamas, and motions him to follow her upstairs.
The mailman had the best sex of his entire life, and when they were done, he went downstairs. On the table was a huge breakfast, waffles, eggs, pancakes, the whole deal, a cup of coffee with a $5 bill underneath.
The mailman was so happy, but curious, so he said to the blond, "Thank you, this has been the best day of my life, you have been more than kind, but I have to ask, what's the $5. dollar bill for?"
The lady replied, "Oh that, I asked my husband what shall we do for you, and he said, "Screw him! Give him $5 bucks", but the breakfast was my idea."
 
After living in the remote wilderness all of his life, an old hillbilly decided it was time to visit the big city. In one of the stores, he picks up a mirror and looks in it. Not knowing what it was, he remarked, "How about that! Here's a picture of my daddy."
He bought the 'picture', but on the way home he remembered his wife, Lizzy, didn't like his father. So he hung it in the barn, and every morning before leaving for the fields, he would go there and look at it. Lizzy began to get suspicious of these many trips to the barn.
One day after her husband left, she searched the barn and found the mirror. As she looked into the glass, she fumed, "So that's the ugly bitch he's runnin' around with."
 
That last joke would be WAY funnier if it was an Albanian couple instead of hillbillies.


I think Borat may be bringing around my flavor of humor.
 
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