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you might be from new england if...

Discussion in 'NorthEast' started by pissedoffsol, Sep 19, 2005.

  1. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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    Forget Rednecks ... here's what Jeff Foxworthy has to say on New Englanders:

    If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through 36 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping it will swim by, you might live in New England.

    If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year because Mt. Washington is the coldest spot in the nation, and Boston gets more snow than any other major city in the US, you live in New England.

    If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May, you live in New England. ( we don't even have real DQ..it's "whippy dip")

    If you instinctively walk like a penguin for six months out of the year, you live in New England.

    If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you live in New England.

    If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you live in New England.

    If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you live in New England.

    "Vacation" means going anywhere south of New York City for the weekend.

    You measure distance in hours.

    You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.

    You have switched from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day, and back again.

    You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard without flinching! .

    You install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked.

    You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend/wife knows how to use them.

    You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.

    Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.

    You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction. TOOOO TRUE

    Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.
    "Down South" to you mean Philadelphia.

    Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new shed. (...pig pen et al)

    Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.

    You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.

    You find 10 degrees "a little chilly."
    You actually understand these jokes, and forward them to all your New England friends


    :lol:
     
  2. CRX-YEM

    CRX-YEM Super Moderator Moderator VIP

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    Which is very quite accurate. they cancel school in North Carolina for a heavy rain
     
  3. EGProject

    EGProject YEEEEAAHHHHH

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    Damn right.
     
  4. theodorcrx

    theodorcrx Member

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    hahahahahah :lol:
    i live in new england and just about any store i go to and ask for help they usually say "ohh and i uhh don't work here." my girlfriend knows how to use a jumper cable. and just to let you know it ain't gonna be fall this season. it's gonna be almost winter.
     
  5. E_SolSi

    E_SolSi Member of the 20 nut club Moderator VIP

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  6. Seany-izzle

    Seany-izzle New Member

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    how right he is.
     
  7. Seany-izzle

    Seany-izzle New Member

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    they cancel school in Cincy for an inch of snow. seriously, have a friend who is from t here, when they get like 3 inches they close down highways and roads.. pussies.
     
  8. Celerity

    Celerity Well-Known Member

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    "You measure distance in hours"

    HAHAH Yeah, I freaked people out in Colorado with that one. "How far is Arvada from you?" "IT's about 20 minutes away" "..... That's a measurement of time"


    "Florissant is 30 minutes away, or it's 5 hours if you take the Rampart". People in my complex just looked at me funny.
     
  9. swanny

    swanny Senior Member

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    Nice. I chuckled a few times, although i'm not sure if North Central PA counts as NE.
     
  10. 94accordex

    94accordex Member

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    :werd: That describes my neighborhood exactly...we actually welcome the snow, because if it's just cold and ice, the road cracks and potholes form so bad that it can easily destroy a suspension unless you go like 10 mph or under...



    :werd: x 2

    Just finishing up "road contstruction season" right now, soon be moving on to "almost winter!" LOL!
     
  11. EGProject

    EGProject YEEEEAAHHHHH

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    You might be from New England if...




    You have 3 sets of wheels for your daily driver.

    -Your "summer wheels"

    -Your "winter wheels"

    -Your "track" wheels.
     
  12. ScrapinSi

    ScrapinSi Senior Member

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    ESPECIALLY on my road.. (I live on a dirt road)
     
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