--------------------------------------------------------------
A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "Sorry, we don't serve food in here."
--------------------------------------------------------------
A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Glad Wrap shorts. The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."
--------------------------------------------------------------
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is
there anything you can do for him? "
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What?, Because he's cross-eyed?"
"No, because he's really heavy"
--------------------------------------------------------------
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the
craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
--------------------------------------------------------------
A man walks into doctor's office. "What seems to be the problem?" asks the doc.
"It's... um...well... I have five penises" replies the man.
"Blimey!" says the doctor, "How do your trousers fit?"
"Like a glove."
--------------------------------------------------------------
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A f sh.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says "dam"
--------------------------------------------------------------
Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other "I'll man the guns, you
drive"
--------------------------------------------------------------
Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Don't worry about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says, "Sorry, we don't serve food in here."
--------------------------------------------------------------
A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Glad Wrap shorts. The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."
--------------------------------------------------------------
A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is
there anything you can do for him? "
"Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth.
Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down."
"What?, Because he's cross-eyed?"
"No, because he's really heavy"
--------------------------------------------------------------
Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the
craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
--------------------------------------------------------------
A man walks into doctor's office. "What seems to be the problem?" asks the doc.
"It's... um...well... I have five penises" replies the man.
"Blimey!" says the doctor, "How do your trousers fit?"
"Like a glove."
--------------------------------------------------------------
What do you call a fish with no eyes? A f sh.
--------------------------------------------------------------
Two fish swim into a concrete wall. One turns to the other and says "dam"
--------------------------------------------------------------
Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other "I'll man the guns, you
drive"
--------------------------------------------------------------
Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Don't worry about the world ending today. It's already tomorrow in Australia.
