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Mens thoughts VS womens

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by jeffie7, Oct 24, 2003.

  1. jeffie7

    jeffie7 Wrong Whole! VIP

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    WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

    "Yes" = No.

    "No" = Yes.

    "Maybe" = No.

    "I'm sorry" = You'll be sorry...

    "We need" = I want.

    "It's your decision" = The correct decision should be obvious by now.

    "Do what ever you want" = You'll pay for this later.

    "We need to talk" = I need to complain.

    "Sure, go ahead" = I don't want you to.

    "I'm not upset" = Of course I'm upset, you moron!

    "You're so manly" = You need a shave, and you sweat a lot.

    "Be romantic, turn out the lights" = I have flabby thighs.

    "This kitchen is so inconvenient" = I want a new house.

    "I want new curtains" = And carpeting, and furniture, and wallpaper.

    "I heard a noise" = I noticed you were almost asleep.

    "Do you love me?" = I'm going to ask for something expensive.

    "How much do you love me?" = I did something today you're going to hate.

    "I'll be ready in a minute" = Kick off your shoes and find a good game on T.V.

    "You have to learn to communicate" = Just agree with me.

    "Are you listening to me!?!" = [Too late! You're dead!]

    ******************************************

    MEN'S ENGLISH:

    "I'm hungry. = I'm hungry.

    "I'm sleepy. = I'm sleepy.

    "I'm tired. = I'm tired.

    "Do you want to go to a movie?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.

    "Can I take you out to dinner?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.

    "Can I call you sometime?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.

    "May I have this dance?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.

    "Nice dress!" = Nice cleavage!

    "You look tense. Let me give you a massage" = I want to fondle you.

    "What's wrong?" = What stupid self-inflicted psychological trauma is it now?

    "What's wrong?" = I guess sex tonight is out of the question?

    "I'm bored" = Do you want to have sex?

    "I love you" = Let's have sex now!

    "I love you, too" = Okay, I said it. Now can we have sex?

    "Yes, I like the way you cut your hair" = I liked it better before.

    "Let's talk" = I'll impress you by showing you I am a deep guy, then maybe sex?

    "Will you marry me?" = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with others.

    "I don't think that blouse and that skirt go well together" = I'm gay.
     
  2. khrisb

    khrisb ******

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    :lmao:
    The men's thought's are all true! Except for the last one...Never had that one...
    Haha! Where do you find all this shit, Jeff?
     
  3. jeffie7

    jeffie7 Wrong Whole! VIP

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    if only you knew.......... =)

    buy my civic and I will tell you =) hehehhehe
     
  4. sportlinecrx

    sportlinecrx Banned

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    i think you forgot one:

    WOMEN:

    fuck you = fuck you

    MEN:

    fuck you = i know i will have to make up for this later

    :D
     
  5. Seany-izzle

    Seany-izzle New Member

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    In a fucking house.
  6. Slo86GT

    Slo86GT Super Moderator

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    Yeah... that pretty much sums H up.
     
  7. Canadian_GSR

    Canadian_GSR Senior Member

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    its easier to beg forgiveness than to ask permission

    only advice i ever listened to
     
  8. noobvang

    noobvang Senior Member

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  9. haccord141

    haccord141 Senior Member

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  10. dmmd3

    dmmd3 Senior Member

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    lmao, so fuckin true. ive had some of those phrases said to me. Too bad i didnt have this handy guide to see what the bitch was really trying to say. :doh:
     
  11. CRX_B16B

    CRX_B16B Senior Member

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  12. cxjon

    cxjon Senior Member

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    taht list is funny :D
     
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