shit went down tonight...
ive been with this girl sabrina for the better part of 2 1/2 years. we met at some silly party, she hit me with a badminton racket and as a joke i was going to sleep with her and i didnt even know her name. horrible huh? well i really started to like her and we dated.
we did so much together, and went through so much shit. her mom hated me and put her under chins, and me on a restraining order but for the 9 months that was on we still saw each other - me in cuffs once for her catching us together and her in cuffs because her mom had no idea what the chins was really about... but we got through it.
it was craziness... imagine a girl who likes cars, and can drive stick really well (after burning out a clutch) and bought my 240sx from me after i got tired of it and wanted to go back to FF. she was there for me when i rolled my civic, and took me everywhere i needed to go when i lost my license for 6 months.
everything was cool for a good while...
shes been working at the hospital for over 3 years, and started college 5 days a week... while working 35-40 hours a week there, and then took on another job... another 10-15 hours...
the last few days, we've been just fighting about how we never spend any time together and how my parents have been driving me crazy at having a "racecar" when i should be out spending on an apartment. sucks. ive been great at budgeting, and i have a sweet credit score... so im thinking im going to move out soon, and leave my turbo projects for some other time and just race the mirage as-is after my rebuild...
anyways, tonight we broke up. it was really bad. ive never cried so hard ever. she wants to stay friends, and she wants us to be together, but with everything on her plate she feels bad that we have no time together. its my fault too, since i nag her about it... ive given up excessive clubbing and nights out with my other girl "friends" (just friends, i promise) and all sorts of other neat stuff that i liked to do.
the thing sabrina was getting at is she doesnt want a boyfriend and she says she isnt looking... she wants things to stay the same just without the title, and she's been afraid to say anything because she doesnt want to hurt me. she still wants me around to hang out with her, and to be "together"... just seems wierd i guess. sucks worse since she had all these big suprises for my birthday, but she still wants everything to happen.
so in a way, nothing is changing, but it is. make sense? i really care about her alot... never thought i could get so attached to this someone who has been a big part of my life since i met her. crazy. its really hard for her to open up sometimes, and ive hardly seen her cry about anything.
it hurts alot, but im not really sure it should. i understand her feelings though. ive tried my best to give her the space she wants. so all in all, she wants to get back together when things quiet down.
i dont know... just makes me feel like shit.
ive been with this girl sabrina for the better part of 2 1/2 years. we met at some silly party, she hit me with a badminton racket and as a joke i was going to sleep with her and i didnt even know her name. horrible huh? well i really started to like her and we dated.
we did so much together, and went through so much shit. her mom hated me and put her under chins, and me on a restraining order but for the 9 months that was on we still saw each other - me in cuffs once for her catching us together and her in cuffs because her mom had no idea what the chins was really about... but we got through it.
it was craziness... imagine a girl who likes cars, and can drive stick really well (after burning out a clutch) and bought my 240sx from me after i got tired of it and wanted to go back to FF. she was there for me when i rolled my civic, and took me everywhere i needed to go when i lost my license for 6 months.
everything was cool for a good while...
shes been working at the hospital for over 3 years, and started college 5 days a week... while working 35-40 hours a week there, and then took on another job... another 10-15 hours...
the last few days, we've been just fighting about how we never spend any time together and how my parents have been driving me crazy at having a "racecar" when i should be out spending on an apartment. sucks. ive been great at budgeting, and i have a sweet credit score... so im thinking im going to move out soon, and leave my turbo projects for some other time and just race the mirage as-is after my rebuild...
anyways, tonight we broke up. it was really bad. ive never cried so hard ever. she wants to stay friends, and she wants us to be together, but with everything on her plate she feels bad that we have no time together. its my fault too, since i nag her about it... ive given up excessive clubbing and nights out with my other girl "friends" (just friends, i promise) and all sorts of other neat stuff that i liked to do.
the thing sabrina was getting at is she doesnt want a boyfriend and she says she isnt looking... she wants things to stay the same just without the title, and she's been afraid to say anything because she doesnt want to hurt me. she still wants me around to hang out with her, and to be "together"... just seems wierd i guess. sucks worse since she had all these big suprises for my birthday, but she still wants everything to happen.
so in a way, nothing is changing, but it is. make sense? i really care about her alot... never thought i could get so attached to this someone who has been a big part of my life since i met her. crazy. its really hard for her to open up sometimes, and ive hardly seen her cry about anything.
it hurts alot, but im not really sure it should. i understand her feelings though. ive tried my best to give her the space she wants. so all in all, she wants to get back together when things quiet down.
i dont know... just makes me feel like shit.