Oh man...I laughed so hard when I started reading this...
I went through a stage in my life (wehn i was about 12yrs old) where I wanted to be a hardcore sniper. I loved the movie sniper.
so I made a sincer for my pellet gun...
get a small 1/2" dia pipe by like 4-6" then a 1" dia that is about 2" longer than the smaller piece.
Drill a ton of holes in the 1/2" peice try to get atleast 4 in a circle and every 1/2 " or so
Just rittle it with holes.
then place the smaller piece inside the larger peice center it using some screws through the larger peice to pin it together.
pack the space with cotton balls
then secure it to the end of the gun w/ screws ( you will scratch ur gun) then pack the rest of the area between the gun and the outer pcv pipe with cotton balls again
then use some tape to seal it off.
now for the other end. take a piece of duct tape, or whatever you would liike and place it over the entire end. before you do that, make sure that the inside pipe is decently lined up. So put the piece of duct tape over the gun, and go shoot it a few times (with pellets or bbs of course) and it will make a decent hole. Take the piece of tape off, layer it a few times with more duct tape and then use a hole-punch to make a clean hole. Place it back over the tip and you're ready to go.
optional: paint the pcv pipe black to match color so it doesn't look so obvious. while you're getting some pcv get another piece that is as long as your barrel so you can mount it to the end of your scope. This will allow you to wrap your gun with a blanket or something so that you can make the action fo the gun quiter.
the silencer made my gun quite a bit quiter but you could still hear it if you're listening. a
btw, you should setup something so that you can shoot from within the house so it isn't obvious
peace