Rant Rant Rant Rant. I need to get some shit off my chest.
My mom has a neuro muscular disease that is taking a serious toll on her. She lives in state funded housing, but a 3 bedroom and she's single and alone so she is supposed to have a 1 bedroom. I make up the difference so I don't have to move her. But this genetic disease is killer her. She was walking 2 miles two years ago 3 times a week with limited mobility and 70% breathing and now she has a walker and is at 60% capacity. I go home every weekend(if not working a side job) to help her but it never seems to be enough.
Girls are killing me. I meet one, and she turns out to be crazy and a slut the minute I start seeing her often. Another one, turns out to be fricking awesome but the minute I ask her out on a date(we partied a few times together and even passed out together in the same bed) is in a relationship now with some other dude. Another one that I have taken out on a couple dates and hung out with a few times plus well is different and won't be around in a month for the entire summer. The final one is well 18 and in high school and well isn't horrible but I'm 20 in college and really unfortunately an adult(mind).
The most recent depression came from yeah finding out the girl I asked to hang out again well....has a boyfriend now, even thogh I kicked it with her yesterday, friday and her own best friend didn't know she liked anyone besides being remotely interested in me. .... And is banging hot, has the same interests, and well is one of those you really want to take out th eminute you get to know them.
Then there is work. I'm making shit wages. I am working on a $40,000 deck. I kid you not. Yet I'm making 11/hr. Then recently I found out when I'm done with this deck (projected tuesday) I'm getting laid off for 2 weeks until the next foundation is poured for me to start another house. A guy approaches me at work and says hey I got a gig for you but it isn't general construction like you do. Well turns out its installing windows which blows I think after a couple hours of doing it, but the wage will be 12.50/hr but I won't be able to work as much(starts at 8 am instead of 7am) so the wage is speculative as it won't effect my actual month to month income. Both require me to work in this endless rain.
School. I'm not doing hot. I get b's, and B's won't get me into the program I want to be in. I'm sick of taking general classes, but until I get accepted into the University of Washington then the Construction Management, I'm stuck at another school, WWU, doing general classes, hoping to get in. I really am sick of it.
Summer starts for me June 16. I'll be working for my dad running a job site hopefully in Medina, or Huntspoint, but its all in the air and I might have to work with his other employee. A dude, used to be my best friend until well he back stabbed me a couple weeks ago with the said slut above. So its really speculative if I can suck it up. He keeps calling trying to make amends and well I just don't want to deal with the drama anymore of it.
Roommates. My roommates and I aren't cool anymore. I live with 3 dudes, and a girl. One of the dudes and the girl are against us 3, other dudes, and well its old. We don't do anything as a house, and try to make small talk until they move out at the end of June. We got another roommate signed up for next year but still don't have the 5th. Our leasing agency which is also known as the gustapo they're so strict, is well being impatient, even though we gave them the whole holding deposit to keep the lease(goes towards first month in the summer).
My brother borrowed money from me cuz he moved on to the lake, Lake Stevens, and well is broke and needs me to rent a room from him the summer. I might, but its getting tough cuz he's stretching me thin with the car/bike payment/rent/school, etc.
I don't know what I'm going to do with most of this stuff. I just find myself really unhappy at the current moment and drinking every weekend even though I used to not drink at all this time of last year. I got to go wakeboarding last friday and it cheered me up but then the drama came back with a phone call from the said best friend. I want to run away. I just want to leave or start over.
I won't find out from UW if I get in until July. It's gay. I'm really impatient, and I'm getting really depressed and I'm usually an optomistic person. All I have right now for free time is working out and the weekends when I drink the night away.
[/end rant]
My mom has a neuro muscular disease that is taking a serious toll on her. She lives in state funded housing, but a 3 bedroom and she's single and alone so she is supposed to have a 1 bedroom. I make up the difference so I don't have to move her. But this genetic disease is killer her. She was walking 2 miles two years ago 3 times a week with limited mobility and 70% breathing and now she has a walker and is at 60% capacity. I go home every weekend(if not working a side job) to help her but it never seems to be enough.
Girls are killing me. I meet one, and she turns out to be crazy and a slut the minute I start seeing her often. Another one, turns out to be fricking awesome but the minute I ask her out on a date(we partied a few times together and even passed out together in the same bed) is in a relationship now with some other dude. Another one that I have taken out on a couple dates and hung out with a few times plus well is different and won't be around in a month for the entire summer. The final one is well 18 and in high school and well isn't horrible but I'm 20 in college and really unfortunately an adult(mind).
The most recent depression came from yeah finding out the girl I asked to hang out again well....has a boyfriend now, even thogh I kicked it with her yesterday, friday and her own best friend didn't know she liked anyone besides being remotely interested in me. .... And is banging hot, has the same interests, and well is one of those you really want to take out th eminute you get to know them.
Then there is work. I'm making shit wages. I am working on a $40,000 deck. I kid you not. Yet I'm making 11/hr. Then recently I found out when I'm done with this deck (projected tuesday) I'm getting laid off for 2 weeks until the next foundation is poured for me to start another house. A guy approaches me at work and says hey I got a gig for you but it isn't general construction like you do. Well turns out its installing windows which blows I think after a couple hours of doing it, but the wage will be 12.50/hr but I won't be able to work as much(starts at 8 am instead of 7am) so the wage is speculative as it won't effect my actual month to month income. Both require me to work in this endless rain.
School. I'm not doing hot. I get b's, and B's won't get me into the program I want to be in. I'm sick of taking general classes, but until I get accepted into the University of Washington then the Construction Management, I'm stuck at another school, WWU, doing general classes, hoping to get in. I really am sick of it.
Summer starts for me June 16. I'll be working for my dad running a job site hopefully in Medina, or Huntspoint, but its all in the air and I might have to work with his other employee. A dude, used to be my best friend until well he back stabbed me a couple weeks ago with the said slut above. So its really speculative if I can suck it up. He keeps calling trying to make amends and well I just don't want to deal with the drama anymore of it.
Roommates. My roommates and I aren't cool anymore. I live with 3 dudes, and a girl. One of the dudes and the girl are against us 3, other dudes, and well its old. We don't do anything as a house, and try to make small talk until they move out at the end of June. We got another roommate signed up for next year but still don't have the 5th. Our leasing agency which is also known as the gustapo they're so strict, is well being impatient, even though we gave them the whole holding deposit to keep the lease(goes towards first month in the summer).
My brother borrowed money from me cuz he moved on to the lake, Lake Stevens, and well is broke and needs me to rent a room from him the summer. I might, but its getting tough cuz he's stretching me thin with the car/bike payment/rent/school, etc.
I don't know what I'm going to do with most of this stuff. I just find myself really unhappy at the current moment and drinking every weekend even though I used to not drink at all this time of last year. I got to go wakeboarding last friday and it cheered me up but then the drama came back with a phone call from the said best friend. I want to run away. I just want to leave or start over.
I won't find out from UW if I get in until July. It's gay. I'm really impatient, and I'm getting really depressed and I'm usually an optomistic person. All I have right now for free time is working out and the weekends when I drink the night away.
[/end rant]