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My life is not what it should be right now.

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by BigJ, Apr 30, 2007.

  1. BigJ

    BigJ I'm just about that action Boss. VIP

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    Rant Rant Rant Rant. I need to get some shit off my chest.



    My mom has a neuro muscular disease that is taking a serious toll on her. She lives in state funded housing, but a 3 bedroom and she's single and alone so she is supposed to have a 1 bedroom. I make up the difference so I don't have to move her. But this genetic disease is killer her. She was walking 2 miles two years ago 3 times a week with limited mobility and 70% breathing and now she has a walker and is at 60% capacity. I go home every weekend(if not working a side job) to help her but it never seems to be enough.


    Girls are killing me. I meet one, and she turns out to be crazy and a slut the minute I start seeing her often. Another one, turns out to be fricking awesome but the minute I ask her out on a date(we partied a few times together and even passed out together in the same bed) is in a relationship now with some other dude. Another one that I have taken out on a couple dates and hung out with a few times plus well is different and won't be around in a month for the entire summer. The final one is well 18 and in high school and well isn't horrible but I'm 20 in college and really unfortunately an adult(mind).

    The most recent depression came from yeah finding out the girl I asked to hang out again well....has a boyfriend now, even thogh I kicked it with her yesterday, friday and her own best friend didn't know she liked anyone besides being remotely interested in me. .... And is banging hot, has the same interests, and well is one of those you really want to take out th eminute you get to know them.




    Then there is work. I'm making shit wages. I am working on a $40,000 deck. I kid you not. Yet I'm making 11/hr. Then recently I found out when I'm done with this deck (projected tuesday) I'm getting laid off for 2 weeks until the next foundation is poured for me to start another house. A guy approaches me at work and says hey I got a gig for you but it isn't general construction like you do. Well turns out its installing windows which blows I think after a couple hours of doing it, but the wage will be 12.50/hr but I won't be able to work as much(starts at 8 am instead of 7am) so the wage is speculative as it won't effect my actual month to month income. Both require me to work in this endless rain.



    School. I'm not doing hot. I get b's, and B's won't get me into the program I want to be in. I'm sick of taking general classes, but until I get accepted into the University of Washington then the Construction Management, I'm stuck at another school, WWU, doing general classes, hoping to get in. I really am sick of it.


    Summer starts for me June 16. I'll be working for my dad running a job site hopefully in Medina, or Huntspoint, but its all in the air and I might have to work with his other employee. A dude, used to be my best friend until well he back stabbed me a couple weeks ago with the said slut above. So its really speculative if I can suck it up. He keeps calling trying to make amends and well I just don't want to deal with the drama anymore of it.



    Roommates. My roommates and I aren't cool anymore. I live with 3 dudes, and a girl. One of the dudes and the girl are against us 3, other dudes, and well its old. We don't do anything as a house, and try to make small talk until they move out at the end of June. We got another roommate signed up for next year but still don't have the 5th. Our leasing agency which is also known as the gustapo they're so strict, is well being impatient, even though we gave them the whole holding deposit to keep the lease(goes towards first month in the summer).


    My brother borrowed money from me cuz he moved on to the lake, Lake Stevens, and well is broke and needs me to rent a room from him the summer. I might, but its getting tough cuz he's stretching me thin with the car/bike payment/rent/school, etc.



    I don't know what I'm going to do with most of this stuff. I just find myself really unhappy at the current moment and drinking every weekend even though I used to not drink at all this time of last year. I got to go wakeboarding last friday and it cheered me up but then the drama came back with a phone call from the said best friend. I want to run away. I just want to leave or start over.

    I won't find out from UW if I get in until July. It's gay. I'm really impatient, and I'm getting really depressed and I'm usually an optomistic person. All I have right now for free time is working out and the weekends when I drink the night away.




    [/end rant]
     
  2. BigJ

    BigJ I'm just about that action Boss. VIP

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    Premature on the girl I want to see again. I guess the relationship thing was a joke... I didn't get it.
     
  3. get_nick

    get_nick These snozzberries taste like snozzberries... VIP

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    i feel ya man. i have been there. school was a bitch, girls are a pain in the ass, sometimes shit sucks.

    there is a song by kanye west called "spaceship". i love it. if you like hip hop, and are in the dumps like i think you are, take a listen. it's a great track.
     
  4. pissedoffsol

    pissedoffsol RETIRED

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    women: ruining men's lives since 4343432423423 BC

    :D

    recommended solutions to problems:

    Mom - no idea. i couldn't begin to offer advice on that.
    girls - fuck 'em. live your life. ignore the shit out of 'em, watch a lot of porn.
    friends - they come and go. people who were my best friends 5 years ago i barely even talk to any more.
    job - look around for something else. 11 bucks an hour for construction is a joke. you're being used, and you know it. look in the paper. go to a labor joint. i'm sure theres something else better out there.
     
  5. ThatGuy4life

    ThatGuy4life The Riced Sleeper

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    I think Blanco said it all, enjot the time you have left with moms, girls come and go just like friends do so don't worry, and as for the job if you're not happy start looking elsewhere.
     
  6. Celerity

    Celerity Well-Known Member

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    The Buddha tells us that everyone suffers. And I have found that be absolutely true. You're not alone, things will get better and then worse, then better, then worse (Confusius say: Life is like Tides).

    All these women and roommates and co workers and bosses, poor or rich, healthy or sick, ALL suffer.
     
  7. chestercheeto48

    chestercheeto48 Senior Member VIP

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    Not unless he is an apprentice and been doing it awile. In my area you start out at 50-60% of scale which is around 24.00 in my area. So he is right on in terms of wages at least for my area. Do you need to get the construction management degree? In my experience you don't really need it. In fact most guys don't get it untill later in life because they would rather get the journeyman's card and experience. One of my good buddys likened it to the Lt.'s in the army. Sure they are commisioned officers but they didn't really know anything. The Sargents were the ones that knew it all - because of experience. In my honest opinion I would take a look at doing your apprenticeship. Why?

    Pros:

    -your hours worked already will most likely gain you some credit.
    -The more hours credited means the more you earn on the pay scale.
    -The company will most likely pay for some/all of your tuition.
    -Job security as the company is paying for your schooling. Why would they pay only to lay you off.

    Cons:
    -You are commited to 4 years of an Apprenticeship.
    -Maybe difficult to find a sponsoring company.
    -You may have to stay at the company for a set number of years after you get your card because they paid for you.


    I teach an apprenticeship class to high school seniors so if you need any other info let me know.
     
  8. smarty009

    smarty009 Senior Member

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    yup...everyone has their ups and downs...youre in a down right now...but you need to find something...to bring you up...something positive...no matter how small of a positive it is...find it and use that to build you back up...

    and i dont want to sound like a cold-hearted bitch...because im not one...i can relate...but sometimes you need someone to tell you to get off your ass and quit moping...

    please dont take that the wrong way...get out and find a new job...you have the construction experience...there are plenty of jobs out there that will pay way more than 11/hr...and more than the 12.50/hr window job

    if youre not happy with B's...work harder...A's are definitely possible if you put your mind to it...i made plenty of A's...i had a 3.56 GPA in December when i received my bachelor's

    One thing that definitely isnt helping your grades is the girls...drop em dude...ive been with the same girl for 5 and a half years...and that one girl alone was enough to keep my GPA from closer to 4.0 than it was...i made 3 C's throughout college...and all 3 of those i can say i made because of where my mind was with her...you have to keep your mind right if you plan on making A's in college...A's dont come easy...but they are definitely attainable if you have your mind in the right place...and that place isnt on girls...

    With your mom...Blanco said it best...just spend as much time as you can with her...when it is her time to go...you need to be satisfied with the time you spent with her...

    anyways...just take everything in stride...it will all work out...but only if you get up and do something about it...
     
  9. BigJ

    BigJ I'm just about that action Boss. VIP

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    Thanks guys.

    I just don't know for the first time in my life. Usually I have everything dialed in or what not and now its like its taking me for a ride.
     
  10. smarty009

    smarty009 Senior Member

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    it happens...you just need to regroup and get back on track...you can do it man...
     
  11. BigJ

    BigJ I'm just about that action Boss. VIP

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    I've been doing this since I was a kid but in the actual field probably around 3-4 years experience. Dad has a high end company.... . I need business knowledge to make serious money. I do general contracting for a residential company. I know you makgood wages in the Union, but its not for me. I went to college first, and my work comes second. It's for general experience. I can tell anyone here how to frame an entire house, how to side an entire house, roof, etc, just because of my experience and getting tossed in the thick of things. It just sucks because I'm a part time worker where they won't give me a reasonable wage because my day to day projects are around 6 hours worth, not the average guys' around 8-9.
     
  12. chestercheeto48

    chestercheeto48 Senior Member VIP

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    It happens. Just roll with the punches and it will work itself out. Just make sure you are not overlooking the answer because it is not what you expected.
     
  13. chestercheeto48

    chestercheeto48 Senior Member VIP

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    I never said a word about the Union. You don't need to join a union to be an apprentice. I guess I am confused as to what you see yourself doing. If you want to GC then I would still recommend getting some actual training as a carpenter. What type of company does your dad own? Is your dad the one demanding the degree or is it you? All I am saying is that you do not necessarily need the Construction Management degree to do what it sounds like you want to do.
     
  14. SHOGUNOVDDRK

    SHOGUNOVDDRK New Member

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    sorry to hear that about your moms.....(imagine me saying that with a U)

    girls i agree fuck'em...just ignore there flirtatious shit just watch a shit load of porn.....^_^

    true friends are always down for a cruise or a quick chat or whatever....ive been best friends with the same guy for about 10 years now which if you look at it is a long time for a 17 year old....but even though him and i hardly talk cuz we always busy we still good.....friends will come and go but the true ones will stick around through the good and bad...

    and for that job of yours....i think your getting raped.....

    ill second that....
     
  15. BigJ

    BigJ I'm just about that action Boss. VIP

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    We don't really have "apprentices" over here or journeyman cards or any of that. Only place that is is in the union. It's like I have my own tools, I get told to build something, if I don't know I ask a question or two, then I build it. In the first couple months I kind of shadowed someone to get the hang of the difficult stuff, but generally I'm let loose. My father has an exterior finish company, and this summer I"m supposed to learn to run a job site. I don't need any kind of degree, but I want that degree as a fall back. Anything goes sour, you can get a job easy.
     
  16. BigJ

    BigJ I'm just about that action Boss. VIP

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    I never really was a teenager. I didn't get to do teen stuff often. I was busy taking care of my mom and working all high school.
     
  17. jamesA

    jamesA Well known pissed off telephone guy VIP

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    Welcome to my world, and I turn 25 in a little more than 3 months.
     
  18. Celerity

    Celerity Well-Known Member

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    OOOOOHHH And how. Your 20s are practice run anyway. Take it easy and enjoy, because it's over too soon.
     
  19. chestercheeto48

    chestercheeto48 Senior Member VIP

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    I understand where you are going with the idea of having a degree but I don't necessarily think that you need to have a degree to have something to fall back on. I was looking at Washington States Construction program and I noticed that they have a Certificate for that program as well.

    If it were me (which it almost was at least job wise a few years ago) I would do the following.

    1) Determine if Construction is actually where I want to be. For me I couldn't answer that definately so I chose to become a Tech Ed teacher and stil do construction during the summers. If you can't answer 100% either than I would maybe explore other career options.

    2) I would take a few Business classes at a Tech School to see if you like the business side of it.

    3) If you answered yes to #1 enroll in the apprenticeship for your area of interest
    I found this site on the apprenticeship requirements for Washington state. With a good company IT DOESN"T HAVE TO BE UNION from what I understand.
    http://www.lni.wa.gov/TradesLicensing/Apprenticeship/files/standards/0591.pdf
    I would never hire anyone to do a professional job uless that person had the credetials to back it up. Would you have a doctor do surgery without a medical license? Sure it can be done but will the outcome be desirable?

    4) Do the interview and get all of the hours you have already worked credited to the hours required so that you move up onto the pay scale. As soon as you are accepted as an apprentice you are gaurenteed 60% of scale. FYI this site lists the prevailing wage for what I am assuming a Union Carpenter based on your info for the various counties. That would put you at 19 or so dollars an hour.

    http://www.lni.wa.gov/prevailingwage/jwages/20062/carp20062.pdf

    It looks like for most counties the prevailing wage is between 32-42.00 an hour. At 60% of that you are looking at Even if you weren't an apprentice you should be pulling in half of that based on the skills you claim to have. I would highly suggest looking into that some more.

    5) While you are doing all of this learn as much as you can about the workings of the jobsite, management, and whatever else you feel is important.

    6) Find a solid company and start working your way up the ladder. Carpenter > Forman > Super > so on and so on. That way if the bottom falls out of that company or you have to move you are still able to take you Journeyman card and what ever experience with you when you leave. Construction management degrees are still fairly new in concept. I am willing to bet most companies still have a few people on their staff with no college what so ever.


    These are the steps I would take if I were in your shoes but I am not so all of this may just be info for others. The main advice here is that you need a solid plan and then put it into action. I am not exactly sure what exterior finish is but unless you are 100% sure I would also not get too deep into that company - no matter what anyone else says you don't have to follow in footsteps.

    I really hope it all works out in the end.
     
    Last edited: Apr 30, 2007
  20. totalburnout

    totalburnout Well-Known Member VIP

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    Uhhhhhhh I'm with you on the relationship.

    Everything else you got me beat on.

    Sorry bro.

    girls can be fun or no fun when they dump your ass.
     
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