im wanna get my ass fired

[sportlinecrx]

i cant take the stupid frickin problems at my job any longer and i dont want to quit cause i wont be able to collect unemployment.

i already come in an hour late everyday, take long lunches, surf the net when i should be working, etc... but my boss doesnt want to fire me cause he already tried looking for people with my qualifications to assist me, and there basically arent any in this part of the world ....at least none that answer his ads.

any suggestions on how to get fired, and maybe not have it affect your rep? thought this would make an interesting thread.

 

[dohcvtec_accord]

Fuck your boss's daughter on his desk?

 

[xj0hnx]

Piss in his coffee cup....in front of him.

 

[civicious]

pee in the coffee. and stop flushing the toilets.

 

[civicious]

dammit...didn't mean to xerox there

 

[RENR]

dont call it when your gona be late or not show up. get caught spankingit in the restroom or just nut on your boss's face.

 

[civicious]

i dont know about anyone else, but I get the feeling that busting a squizzy on your boss's face might keep you from getting a decent job in the future. unless you've got an...um...strange boss

 

[sportlinecrx]

check this out:

one day my boss tells us this story which was told to him by one of our outside contractors...
he said a few of the guys out back were playing with a nail gun and one guy pointed it to his head like he was gonna shoot himself, and the gun went off! the nail drove itself about 1inch into his head. the guy pulled it out with a pair of pliers, then they drove him to the hospital. the nail missed his brain by millimeters.

so my boss asks the guy what he did after that. the owner says "what did i do?!! well of course i fired the guy!" then my boss says to us..."i guess when they are that stupid you almost have to fire them."

 

[civicious]

a redneck's last words: "hey yall, watch this!"

 

[sportlinecrx]

 

[MaaseyRacer]

The banging your bosses idea is the best idea I have heard so far.

 

[jamesA]

just stop showing up. and when they call you say sure i'll be in in a minute, walk in, piss on his desk, walk out and go eat lunch.

 

[starboy869]

What about finding a better job in your free time. Also when do you land a new better job you can just quit this one. No hastle of collection employment insurance.

 

[posol]

someone needs to rent office space.

you GET RAISES by doing those things...

 

[jamesA]

Originally posted by pissedoffsol@Sep 4 2003, 09:46 PM
someone needs to rent office space.

you GET RAISES by doing those things...

I love that movie. He was sittin there playin tetris eating cheese puffs and drinking a pepsi and his boss just walked off. He's my hero.

 

[brc80]

Your in chino right? What do you do for work?

 

[BodyDroppedNikes]

call in dead

 

[khrisb]

Don't shower or shave. Dye your hair pink. Wear dresses to work.
Just off the top of my head...

 

[Tonyd0821]

just quit. what the fuck?

be rude to your fucking customers, tell the boss to fuckoff, and be habitually late to work. how hard can it be?

 

[Prowler]

Start printing off tons of HondaSwap.com stickers for everyone and ship them out. Then send me more Omega decals. Basically steal supplies and work on them during business hours, like it's a big rush to have done over other orders.