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Pleased with my bravery I rushed home and duly went about slathering this "cream" over my marvellous pendulous orbs and sat back for 15 minutes to allow it to work its magic on my Johnson mane which I'm told bares a close resemblance to Clarkson's barnet from the early nineties.

Jeremy-Clarkson.jpg
 
I wish I was half as clever as some of those reviewers.
 
I cannot stop my laughing for anything in the world it took me like 8 whole mins to write this:bo::bo::bo:
 
Some of the reviews from today are starting to suck. The other ones were fucking funny
 
Pretty sure the people around me think I'm crazy because I'm cracking up laughing.
 
i'm pretty sure i woke my roommate up from laughing.. lol.. i think its more the UK lingo that makes this hilarious
 
I'm pretty sure, this is the best one.


5.0 out of 5 stars with Veet, you need fast feet!, 26 April 2012

By
glowing orbs - See all my reviews




This review is from: Veet for Men Hair Removal Gel Creme 200 ml (Personal Care)
Been trimming the old fizz for a while now, always grows back quick, even on a close fly by with the trimmers!
My mates in the cafe rated it, , the wife rates it, I thought it's got to be good...

Based on that I bought a tube in my lunch hour, having an easy day, so I thought, I'll pop into the site loos and prep myself, surprise the wife tonight and we could both go bare bouncing together.

I did the job, pulled up my kit and washed my hands, thought I had time to spare walking over to the onsite showers...

The onsite showers hadn't been connected yet! This left the water butt way over the other side of the site by the cement mixers...

The site accident report states: ` for some unknown reason the carpenter stripped stark bullock naked running across site, he fell into the cement footings and broke his leg, before climbing out and sitting in the water butt. Unfortunately the brick layer thought he was about to be attacked by a frenzied grey slime coloured beast and smashed his trowel down flat on top of the carpenters head, knocking him unconscious.
The ambulance arrived and because of the carpenters pleading treated the scalded clangers first!
HSE to investigate for unknown harmful toxic substance on site.'

I only remember feeling that I was running ways from a fire reaching between my legs, I don't remember the fall into cement, I don't remember landing arse first into the water butt, I do remember being lifted out of the water and screaming to be put back in.

So, use this stuff only in the bathroom, with the bath already run and your wife standing with a watering can as back up.

My maraca's took five days to settle down, the bleached skin took on the blue dye from the cement retardant in the water butt and my wife won't go down on me, because she says I look like a miniature turkeys neck and can't stop pissing herself laughing until she gets hiccups!

This stuff does do what it says and a whole lot more!
6 out of 5

 
interesting use of the review area

I have been with my current partner for 7 years and we have always had a quite active and very enjoyable sex life.
About a year ago I started a new job. Both of us were delighted as I had been out of work for some time.
It was well paid with some lucrative bonuses depending on me meeting quotas.
First day and I arrive, early obviously to show my enthusiasm. I'm greeted at reception by a young, very attractive young lady who had the most amazing smile I've ever seen.
She was simply stunning.
I had to wait for someone to sign me in and as I sat there we got chatting, just general stuff, but we had a laugh.
The company is very social and of a Friday a lot of them head to the local for a few drinks and to unwind. Work hard and play hard I guess.
A couple of weeks went by and I was getting on great. I always had a big smile for the receptionist (Lisa), as you do with attractive people. Sometimes I'd stop to say Hi and see how she was.
So one Friday morning she asked me if I was going for a drink that evening, I said I didn't really know people that well and I'd feel a bit out of place until I got to know people a bit better. She said I could go along with her and she'd make sure I was made to `feel welcome'.
There seemed to be a suggestive hint about the way she said it, which I have to say did kind of sway me so I agreed and she said to meet her at 6 and we'd go over together.
6 o'clock came and we headed over to the pub, an easy banter was established between us and the conversation flowed. We got a couple of drinks and she introduced me to some people that I hadn't met. As the evening went on we just seemed to become absorbed in our own conversation and didn't really mix with the others as much. The drink flowed and we both were getting pretty well oiled.
We had such a laugh and we both kept telling each other how much we were enjoying each other's company.
She had raven hair and brown eyes, a body to die for. She was intelligent, witty, everything I could ever want in a woman and way out of my league, or so I thought.
I didn't lie to her and when asked I told her that I had been seeing someone for quite a long time. She asked if I had ever cheated and I told her no, and that I never would.
She said "That's a pity". I told her to stop, that it wasn't fair. By the end of the night it was just the two of us and we shared a taxi home.
I brought her in for a drink, obviously in my drunken state thinking that this was OK because we were just `mates'.
After making enough noise to wake the dead I eventually got us a drink, but my partner came down stairs to see what the commotion was.
Instead of me with a kebab and chips there was me drinking a bottle of wine with this young, very attractive woman.
My partner (Simone) is athletic, blonde, and a gorgeous woman but I can see now why she took offence to the situation.
I told her nothing was going on and Lisa assured her everything was OK.
Eventually Simone calmed down and we all chatted for a while. She had a few drinks with us, then a few more.
We were all so drunk that I don't really remember the sequence of events, but basically we all ended up in bed together.
It was, up to then, the most amazing experience of my life.
We basically stayed in bed until Sunday and did everything imaginable.
Now Lisa has moved in with myself and Simone and we have spectacular threesomes on a nightly basis.
It's the greatest life I can imagine and I'm stunned that I'm even allowed to watch what goes on, let alone take part.

The hair removal cream is excellent, don't use it on your balls.
 
If i had a story like that (assuming its real) i would post it all over the place as well. Veet hair removal cream reviews included.
 
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