Singulerity, part 2

[Celerity]

Yeah, it's likely. But I'm not going to start my mind kicking off in a tangent it doesn't need to go in. Even if they didn't actually do the nasty, if she's still infatuated with him, I never got a chance anyway.

Eh, it's like getting a feral cat in the house. Doesn't always work regardless of how much chicken you lay out on the porch.

The rules of engagement for her were slightly askew. I am a 32 year old guy, I'm sure that has something to do with it. Way back when, a difference like that may not have mattered, and still lots of girls like much older men. Either way, I was at one level, and her at another. I could deal with it, and still give her a "20 year old's life", but how was she supposed to know ?

 

[SlushboxTeggy]

I can tell you the math isn't accurate enough to base a life choice on.

Just like when we were teenagers. Well, maybe me and Eric, we were still fucked up by lots of things. Those things don't change. As a late teen entering their 20s, we're all faced by the reality that many of the opinions that we formed have been proven to be wrong. It's a confusing time for people regardless of their generational faults.

But this shit in GenMe is fuckin ridiculous. I know that each person can break it, but damn man. There are some major character flaws out there, and it will take either years of pain or perhaps one quick jolt of suffering that will likely drive each of them to jump in front of a train.

No jumping in front of trains. I'm not completely traumatized yet.

As far as your math, I feel your pain. No one our age is single and without kids. It doesn't exist. I'm sure it does, but it's so rare you're better off either thinking it doesn't exist, or - while you're at it - looking for bigfoot.

Are you serious? Everyone is knocked up. I don't know if I have ever said it on here, but all but one girl I dated in middle school has a kid, one has two. Out of them all, i would say two are being raised right. Aiden and David. Why? The piece of shit guys that knocked up the girls have nothing to do with the child's development.

I'm not even so hung up on the single mother bit. But my requirements for a single parent are higher than my requirements for those without - I don't mind a parent so much, but most parents (Single or otherwise) raise their kids so shittily (I dusted off that word for this sentence) that I lose all respect for them, and want to punch their kids.

I work at an arcade. I see it ALL THE TIME. I actually give parents free shit when they discipline their kids, and a full 20 points if their kid is named mike, john, karen, or something normal - and not Colum, Kinsey, Pheileighe or ... god what was the one I saw with Walter.. Scone or something retarded.

Working in restaurants I saw this ALL THE TIME too. Kids are soo bad because their allowed to be.

I actually got a complaint from a customer when I told her she needed to discipline her child and that he couldn't run around the store.

And yes, those are real names, We have birthday parties scheduled for them.

Worst ever was a a 2 year old throwing food at his dad...
"Napoleon, stop that!" as a piece of spaghetti hit and stuck to his forehead. With nothing else said, he literally gave up any attempt at discipline and let me clean up after his son when they left after their meal.

Save the planet. Hit your kids. Seriously. I don't think my parents hit me more than 20 times in 22 years, but they did hit me when I got out of line. You know what I learned? Don't do that again. What else? When someone bigger than you views a situation differently then you, don't run off at the mouth, even if you don't agree. You gain an understanding of respect. Not a respect for people bigger than you, an understanding of respect.

As for the GenMe. While I am part of it, I'm not hopeless. I know I wont live in a penthouse in Manhattan while working in a coffee shop downstairs and not only am I OK with it, I'm glad. I don't need a penthouse and would kill myself with such a menial job.

I know at 22 I can be better, and I work at it, I don't mope about it. When I graduated I was fat and out of shape. Rather than lipo and a personal trainer, I took it upon myself to run 20 miles a week. I'm down 20 lbs. and am even more motivated to drop another 20.

I graduated with a degree in Advertising. Economy is terrible. Big Business has cut a majority of it's advertising budget. Few firms are even hiring. Did I cry that I wasted four years? No, I had fun for four years. I then look at the economy and moved forward. I now have a union job, in a green form of transportation. I have a job that challenges me, that I enjoy, and it isn't going anywhere. Don't believe me? While other transits are cutting budgets our line is being extended to the south and north simultaneously. And let's face it, my 100,000 ton train accelerates better than the Teg.

I know I'm doing better than a lot of my peers and at the same time, if I'm here at 32, hell 25, I'll jump in front of a train. Life is not cyclical. It linear. If your not moving forward, your decaying. Hopefully your line is moving upward. If not, don't just wait until it does, make it happen.

Life isn't all wine and roses, and it can't be. The human spirit needs to feel or at least see suffering to have any form of joy for themselves. This isn't just the pee-ons that sit in Starbucks everyday either, it's everyone, it's human nature.

/rant.

 

[UNDR8D]

Argh.

Single again. I haven't been updating you people, because I felt that the relationship was becoming too public, too documented to be productive.

You may remember my breakfast thread. In that thread I chronicalled my love of a girl who was trashed on drugs and alcohol. After a few months of off time, we got back together and gave it a serious shot.

And we did. Things were working well. Not too fast, in fact pretty slow. She's asked to be a private thing, so I never came around and let everyone know our business. I'll continue not to.

The purpose of the thread was mostly just a "Get this off my chest to 20,000 of my closest friends on the most popular honda forum in the world" the other purpose of discussion was, is, something of a good topic.

The Generation Gap.

Listen, I'm 32. And I have to tell you "kids" this. You're all fucked up in the head. And life, while it may suck for you now, is going to suck BIG TIME when reality hits. The "Self Esteem Generation", or "GenMe" is full of some hard-core shit. This cult of Self and Now Fulfillment is going to kill you all.

I guess I was, way back in the Breakfast thread days, a "Hook-up" . I thought I knew what a hook-up was. I was mostly wrong, because I thought she saw something in me.

I'm going to tell you this now, and I'm sure most will disagree. There is a part of GenMe culture, the Hook up, that's very destructive and will do the exact opposite of what anyone wants it to . Just like the Self Esteem training has done - made a generation of MISERABLE people.

Never before have I seen a culture of throw-away relationships. Throw-away emotions and complete non-sense. At work today (I'm the oldest person where I work, seriously, I'm the lead tech at an arcade) I had a discussion with our College age girls, who are taking a psyche class about the generation gap.

It blows my fuckin mind. You people in GenMe have NO HOPE of ever becoming a success. You have no hope of fulfillment. The TV, your fucked up relationships and your ideas of gratification are going to put you into a very thick, hard brick wall when you realise that you're not special.

You're not even really liked.

You're fucked. I have more to say on the topic, including a few solutions, but I'm in a horrible mood.

Discuss.

I love you. That was beautiful. I think that one of the worst effects of all this is that these attitudes and behaviors spill over into a significant portion of the adult population. I see so many nonME people adopting the behavior of GenME, simply because it is so prevalent. For the people who the 80's left without an identity, it's easy to adopt as part of your own personality. In the beginning of the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, the author talks about how there are two different types of principles: those that people lived by up until the late 60's and 70's, such as honesty, integrity, respect, etc....And the principles espoused by our society and the current generation: self gratification, self actualization, feeling ok about yourself, not hurting anyone's feelings, etc. It's a crock of shit and it has created a fake reality that is on the verge of total ultimate deflation.

Step 1: Stop wearing your heart on your fucking sleeve. You are a clinger. Admit it, deny it, I don't care. You cling to anyone who might make you "feel."

Step 2: Forget the relationship crap, "hookups", etc. Go back to the "dating" scene. Find a beautiful woman who you have a very strong physical attraction to. Take her to lunch or dinner. Converse. If she is a total fucktard, move along. You don't have to fuck, you don't have to join any skin head clans, you don't have to talk her out of slashing her wrists because she had a bad day. Clean, beautiful, non-emo women. Date dozens! One after another, until you find one that you really "click" with. Someone who makes sense to you, someone who draws you in mentally and emotionally. Ask that one out again. Keep the dates short and simple. Get do know her. Don't fuck her right away, because you will lose all respect for her. You need to stop fishing the pond and stop bagging the first fish that bites every time. Go hit the ocean and see what you can pull out.

No. This is exactly the problem. People bounce around so fast that they don't even give themselves, their emotions or comprehension a chance to catch up. It's retarded, it doesn't work, and it makes you hate yourself. Look at those sluts on Sex and the City. Those obnoxious cunts dated and fucked everything that moved in the quest for the perfect guy. Those bitches didn't know the difference between their vaginas and trash cans. How the fuck did they think they were going to be able to make any kind of correct decision concerning their choice of mate. Ya, it's just a TV show but it is heavily rooted in reality. That shit happens every day.

BOTTOM LINE: It doesn't matter how many options you are looking at when you are blind.

huh?

Far, superior or more like very driven?


Edit: Instant satisfaction? I fall, or my friends, colleagues, fellow students fall into these categories? Maybe, there. I guess I surround myself with people that have goals, have ambitions, and work hard on making them selves better people.

Driven? Oh God I rofld so hard when I read that. Cmon you don't really think that being in school means that you are driven? You and the other 20.5 million college students in the U.S.? Give me a break. Gone are the days when a college education means anything. For the two schools I've attended, it is rare to see anyone who is really a dedicated driven ambitious student. The rest of them are all fuck ups skating through on their parents money and delaying reality another 4 (or more) years.

You yourself may be a dedicated student, but don't make the mistake that being in school means that you are an ambitious or hard-working person. Most schools are dumbed down so far to account for the needs of all their retarded students that it is little more than four more years of high school.

Your degree will be essentially worthless and you need to face up to that. You aren't guaranteed shit and will likely get little more than that. As the person on this board with likely the most or highest education level, I have no problem admitting that. I'm not in school because I think that I'm going to "graduate, get a great job, pay off my credit cards, buy a house..." Fat fuckin chance. that shit died in the 40's and 50's.

It's really a matter of simple economics. the more people that attain a given level of education, the less valuable that education will become. As the availability of alternatives and substitutes to YOU becomes greater, the less valuable YOU are. Unless you are at MIT, WPI, an Ivy League School, or equally exclusive prestigious university engaging in Doctoral or Master's level work, you aren't special.

Finishing college is a great achievement for many people. For many others, it is requisite, like finishing high school. It is a matter of who you are and what you take out of it.

I need to stress that I am not bagging on you at all and none of this was meant as a personal attack.

 

[Celerity]

In the beginning of the book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, the author talks about how there are two different types of principles: those that people lived by up until the late 60's and 70's, such as honesty, integrity, respect, etc....And the principles espoused by our society and the current generation: self gratification, self actualization, feeling ok about yourself, not hurting anyone's feelings, etc. It's a crock of shit and it has created a fake reality that is on the verge of total ultimate deflation.

Stephen Covey, good book - but it's meant to go with the class. Take the class. It's an eyeopener. It's also a grand or more, but if you were near me I could teach it (I've been asked to)

This is phrased up as "Character vs Personality". Older generations had to develop character. Hard work, pay off, understanding struggles and keeping a good head on your shoulders, loving your family and looking for the long term results. Newer generations put heavy emphasis on Personality. Do less, make more. A smile gets you everywhere. A day at work is worthless unless everyone laughs at my jokes and thinks i'm the greatest, what have you.

My (ex? I guess) girlfriend thinks she is SUCH a loser because she's not cool. I think she's a winner because she respects her mother. I can't easily undo a lifetime of shit in a few months, but by emphasizing the things she does as a result of good Character, I enforce that behavior and her regard of herself. Moving beyond that, there are years of correction before you can switch from Personality to Character. Look at Celerity post 1 and look at post 18,888. Pick a few between.

 

[SlushboxTeggy]

Stephen Covey, good book - but it's meant to go with the class. Take the class. It's an eyeopener. It's also a grand or more, but if you were near me I could teach it (I've been asked to)

This is phrased up as "Character vs Personality". Older generations had to develop character. Hard work, pay off, understanding struggles and keeping a good head on your shoulders, loving your family and looking for the long term results. Newer generations put heavy emphasis on Personality. Do less, make more. A smile gets you everywhere. A day at work is worthless unless everyone laughs at my jokes and thinks i'm the greatest, what have you.

My (ex? I guess) girlfriend thinks she is SUCH a loser because she's not cool. I think she's a winner because she respects her mother. I can't easily undo a lifetime of shit in a few months, but by emphasizing the things she does as a result of good Character, I enforce that behavior and her regard of herself. Moving beyond that, there are years of correction before you can switch from Personality to Character. Look at Celerity post 1 and look at post 18,888. Pick a few between.

Never took the class and this is obviously my first time ever hearing of it, but I'd have to say I'm a combination of both.

While the description of Character you use describes who I strive to be, I have no problem using a smile or a joke to ease things along. I'm sure I would be described as "funny" and "a charmer" by a lot of my colleagues at school and work but my close friends know me the way I describe. And I would still rather Character over Personality any day. Personality makes the easy days easier, Character gets you through the hard ones.

EDIT: I realized what you would call it. "Charging a situation at the point of least resistance." No reason to hop the 10' fence when there is an open gate.

 

[Celerity]

No, wrong on both counts.

You ALWAYS have character. Whether or not that character is good is the question. You ALWAYS have personality as well. Charging a point of least resistance is a situation that changes.

Lets say you cheat on your girlfriend. Do you tell her things like "it's not you, it's me" and "we should see other people" Or do you say "I cheated on you, I won't lie"

Or do you find that you're not interested solely in her anymore, and be brave and break it off BEFORE cheating on her ?

Got ya there. Yeah, your character sucks.

 

[Celerity]

Perhaps for a better view on the argument, I turn to an excerpt from "Steampunk v. Goth"

Tuesday, July 08, 2008

Humana Vista ergo Steampunk

I love old machines.
Old machines, truck graveyards, rusted equipment
things found in barns
left to the dust for decades
Tell a story of life that is very parallel to a human's story
one of use and suffering
Where things in older vehicles are a "little rough around the edges"
and not everyone can drive an old vehicle
or use an old machine
we've lost touch of the ability to de-coque a valve head
to prime cylinders
to manually pump and maintain fuel flows
people don't even have gauges in cars anymore.
they have disconnected from them
and turned the car or machine itself into a lower, abused thing.
And when I'm in the graveyard and I see a 1940s truck,
with it's big steel smile and bulbous features
I personify it.
And I touch it and smell it and if there is one, I'll sit in the seat
and let it talk to me
It tells me tales of it's life. How for even it's most major faults
it was loved. It was a part of the family. Part of the Ranch. Part of the business
when there is a slight issue with a machine of ours, it is substandard. It isn't cool. It's not immediately rewarding
And it's either cast aside to the trash heap or hesitantly brought to mechanics because of a squeeking door.
We don't want to hear or see how hot the engine is running.
"It's not my concern"
people don't care if the fuel is crap. We get upset at the machine itself because it's seemingly the machine's fault.
And this has translated to how we treat each other.
I find beauty in the old machines. I think it's fantastic that they need primed, massaged and tuned to life. And I am jealous for my parents and their parents for having such a good friend
and for having the patience to have this friend.
this sentiment is at the heart of me
I celebrate defiance.
I don't give up. Ever. I fight with every ounce of my being. I can't imagine another way.
The idea of reclusion and acceptance is one that is alien to me.
Well, acceptance of misery and failure.
And deceit, betrayal, attack and subterfuge
And humilation.
I fight. I fight with everything I have. I fight with a passion in my heart that it defies definition or reason
The concept of not accepting a challenge and beating it are alien to me.
I can't comprehend abandonment.
I feel that no one deserves to be abandoned. Ever.

 

[UNDR8D]

Never took the class and this is obviously my first time ever hearing of it, but I'd have to say I'm a combination of both.

While the description of Character you use describes who I strive to be, I have no problem using a smile or a joke to ease things along. I'm sure I would be described as "funny" and "a charmer" by a lot of my colleagues at school and work but my close friends know me the way I describe. And I would still rather Character over Personality any day. Personality makes the easy days easier, Character gets you through the hard ones.

EDIT: I realized what you would call it. "Charging a situation at the point of least resistance." No reason to hop the 10' fence when there is an open gate.

The point is that people now are focused on building false relationships that serve their purposes. I'll type the exact excerpt later when i get some motivation.

 

[E_SolSi]

 

[reckedracing]

triple gainer?

 

[SlushboxTeggy]

No, wrong on both counts.

You ALWAYS have character. Whether or not that character is good is the question. You ALWAYS have personality as well. Charging a point of least resistance is a situation that changes.

Lets say you cheat on your girlfriend. Do you tell her things like "it's not you, it's me" and "we should see other people" Or do you say "I cheated on you, I won't lie"

Or do you find that you're not interested solely in her anymore, and be brave and break it off BEFORE cheating on her ?

Got ya there. Yeah, your character sucks.

Um, I don't cheat. I've seen what it does to a girl first hand. My older sister was cheated on for a year and a half out of a 2 year relationship. Absolutely destroyed her.

I would break up with a girl first. Basically, I think that being of the "Character" side, doesn't mean I can't be a nice guy on top of it.

 

[Sabz5150]

Wow, this can be summed up in two words:

Over-analyzed.

 

[E_SolSi]

i thought the pic i posted summed it up pretty well

 

[cjvictoria]

Or do you find that you're not interested solely in her anymore, and be brave and break it off BEFORE cheating on her ?

that's exactly how i broke it off with my ex Natasha...

in EF's i complain about my life thread i spoke a bit about the breakup, and how i felt bad about it. but we still talk from time to time on the space. At this point I'm trying to find a way to stop talking to her cuz it's causing problems and i dont want to be a dick about it, cuz thats just not me. I don't really give a damn what she thinks about me, but still I couldn't just be a complete asshole.

 

[Celerity]

What is it with the wierd "I wanna die" shit that I hear all the time from genme'ers ?

 

[cjvictoria]

so what your saying is it's not a big deal just be a dick? im not getting it..

i cant help it that the world we live in is full of over sensitive fuckers that will apeshit on the slightest bit of disarray. i just try to compensate for it and not have any negative shit go on, but then in doing that things get negative anyways... so wtf

 

[SlushboxTeggy]

What is it with the wierd "I wanna die" shit that I hear all the time from genme'ers ?

I've never said or felt that. I'm not a quitter. Except for smoking. And let's face it, I haven't really quit that either.

 

[SlushboxTeggy]

so what your saying is it's not a big deal just be a dick? im not getting it..

For some reason this reminds me of my little brother. 5 of us were walking down George Street at Rutgers when 3 emo-ish dudes were walking the other way.

He goes, "Look at these emo mother fuckers, go kill yourself already... actually don't, I don't want that on my conscience."

Kids turned and got in his face without saying a word.

My brother goes, "Are you serious? Look at your situation rationally. You have two options... you're leaving with something broken, your pride or your nose, I'll let you choose." I was soo proud. If he was just talking shit I would have slapped him, but he can throw like his older brother.

 

[robertbergl]

I like to take a look at myself when break up's happen. I like to realize that I am not God's unique gift to the world. That I am just like every other swinging dick.

Which is perfectly okay.

I also like to acknowledge the fact that females are pigs just like I am. Instead of being angry and lashing out at other people because I'm weak. I try to help someone instead and see how they are faring in life.

Fuck being miserable. It's okay to be alone every now and again. My opinion is that women are going to do whatever they feel like. They will pay the consequences like everyone else who thinks the grass is greener on the other side does. I hope for the best and prepare for the worst. I wish you the best Cel, that shit can hurt pretty bad.

 

[efhondakid]

What is it with the wierd "I wanna die" shit that I hear all the time from genme'ers ?

I have had that feeling for a long time, Ive looked at myself how other people see me and said to myself you will never do anything worth while in your life, so why are you here? Thats just how I feel.