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Job Resignation Letter

Discussion in 'Members' Lounge' started by Cashizslick, Feb 11, 2008.

  1. Cashizslick

    Cashizslick !i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!

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    Hey all,

    I am planning to quit my job within the next few months. This is the type of job that, should I wish to leave in proper form, will require a resignation letter stating that I am resigning, some vague reasons for my resignation, and a brief thank you.

    I have never written one, not that I cannot, but are there any web sights out there where I could DL a template or maybe get some tips on how to construct my own letter?

    Thanks guys/gals,

    C
     
  2. Briansol

    Briansol Admins Admin VIP

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    Dear Sir:

    In googling for ways to quit (see: how to quit a job in nyc - Google Search) I've found that it's best to ask advice on a car forum. The guys there told me that I should write a nice letter thanking you for sticking it to me for the entire time of my tenure. In addition, they also suggested that I return the red streamline stapler that I have been using exclusively, however, I thought better of their advice and plan to keep said item after my leave.

    Thank you for providing me with 342 headaches, 4 colds, and 1 case of explosive diarrhea and lackluster health insurance to fix me.

    May our paths meet again at some point in the future, but for now we must part ways.

    Regards,

    Marshall




    :)
     
    1 person likes this.
  3. Cashizslick

    Cashizslick !i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!

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  4. Sabz5150

    Sabz5150 FALCON PUNCH!!!

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    Boss:

    [​IMG]

    Sincerely, Cash
     
  5. Briansol

    Briansol Admins Admin VIP

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  6. E_SolSi

    E_SolSi Member of the 20 nut club Moderator VIP

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    • get a shoe box (or any type of box really)
    • write "I Quit!!!" on a post it note and throw that in the box
    • drop a deuce in the box
    • put the lid on the box
    • wrap the box with some nice fancy wrapping paper (DO NOT use cheap paper, you want this to leave a good impression)
    • you may want to add some ribbon and a nice fancy bow as well
    • attach a "to: / from:" card to the box so your boss can see that this is for them
    • leave it on their desk on your last day
    done!
     
  7. Briansol

    Briansol Admins Admin VIP

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    It would be even better if you used a jack in the box.

    crank it.
    duh duh duh do do do duh POP goes the terd flying out :D
     
  8. E_SolSi

    E_SolSi Member of the 20 nut club Moderator VIP

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    oh god damn!!! thats good :thumbsup:
     
  9. Cashizslick

    Cashizslick !i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!

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    Hmm, that might work but I wanna give 2 weeks notice. My boss will already know I am quitting so the box wont be as big a surprise :(.



    @ everybody. Killer ideas! Keep it up!
     
  10. Briansol

    Briansol Admins Admin VIP

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    i bet he'll be surprised if there's a dick in the box!
     
  11. Cashizslick

    Cashizslick !i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!

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    Yeah but i am not gonna quit on valentines day. Hmm, this may work tho as it would be symbolic of them sticking it to me for these last couple of years.
     
  12. TurboMirage

    TurboMirage YEEAAAHHH VIP

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    just send jordan one of your dildos.

    or a box in the box.
     
  13. Briansol

    Briansol Admins Admin VIP

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    chocolate covered cock in a valentine, with a jack in the box handle, that plays a song, that has a bowl of mac and cheese with a bird on it, and a nice letter inside.

    that's the ticket.
     
  14. Cashizslick

    Cashizslick !i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!

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    word. thx to everybody who replied! hs personal problem solving ftw!
     
  15. Capt. Orygun

    Capt. Orygun Win the Day

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    just do standard "to who it may concern" in professional memo format

    I do these all the time, for reasons other then resignation

    shoot me a PM with your email address and I'll send you a template
     
  16. E_SolSi

    E_SolSi Member of the 20 nut club Moderator VIP

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    dear boss,

    i am very sorry to have to drop this kind of news on you, but i wanted you to understand that my first priority is to my job and this company. i regret to inform you that i will be unable to continue my position at this job, you see i had some bad Chineese food last night, and i have contracted a terminal form of food poisoning. the doctors have told me i only have about 3 weeks left to live, and i figure that gives me enough time to leave on a positive note with a proper 2 week notice, and still gives me one week to say goodbye to everyone and get all of my final affairs in order. i wish you and the rest of the company the best of luck. oh and by the way dont ever eat at _______.

    sincerely,
    cash
     
  17. Cashizslick

    Cashizslick !i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!i!

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    rofl i wonder if the would ask to see a doctors note.
     
  18. E_SolSi

    E_SolSi Member of the 20 nut club Moderator VIP

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    you just reply to that with something along the lines of "You heartless bastard!!! I'M DIEING!!!!" get some tears going... then storm out of his office
     
  19. invisibledemon

    invisibledemon Bored Moderator VIP

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    this is the funniest thread.
    didnt stop laughing.
     
  20. 93civicracer

    93civicracer Oh, I do a little here and there.

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    Dear Boss:

    Fuck you I hate you your business sucks ass and nobody likes it and I'm the guy that shat on the toilet seat. Peace.
     
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