Celerity
Well-Known Member
Ok, so I realized I left this thread hanging today and am here to revive it considering I'm still in the same cluster-fuck when it comes to dating.
I see entirely where you're coming from and it must be nice to have that sort of confidence at all times, but I need to be let in by a girl before I can gain it. I need to get passed the greetings and into a conversation. I guess that kind of sucks for me, but it's the way I am for now.
You know, I have a problem here. I'm not a forceful person by any means, so when I get a "no thank you" in any way, shape, or form I accept. I think in the back of my head that I don't want to date a girl whom I have to convince from the start, but I guess that's the way it goes. Thanks man, I'm gonna start working on my backstroke.
Duly noted. If there's anything I've learned, it's that I'd much rather get a no than go home wondering if I could have gotten a number at the least.
Ok, so here's my latest news. I met this girl for the fourth or so time at a party last night. Let's just say she is as of today the most beautiful member of the opposite sex(inside and out) I have had the honors of talking to. I talked to her all night while drinking and had absolutely nothing but amazing conversations about everything.
So as we are both walking out to our cars with a group of people, I realized she had to park in a parking lot a little ways down the road, so I offered her a ride over there. We ended up talking for hours until the sun came up. When we were finally going to part ways, I looked her straight in the eye and asked if I could take her out to dinner sometime. I got a pause and I said "Even if as friends for the time being." to which she replied "Friends." before I could even finish the sentence.
This blows my mind, it has to be something about my physical appearance. Maybe it's because she takes dancing seriously and loves to do it, and I can't dance for shit and never took interest into it. It's shit like that that has been bugging me since that morning. I did get her number, and I don't want to give up on her but she is really good friends with two of my really good friends. I will call her later tonight(that waiting a few days thing is just crap) and see how that goes, but this sucks. She loves guitar, so I could write a quick and funny song to try and woo her a bit. All in all, it is 1000x less frustrating to get a crappy answer rather than not asking at all.
Should I just accept the friendship due to the circumstances? Steve, is there a hack to the ladder system? I think I'm fucked.
All good stuff. The late night talk is a good thing. Get back on that track. The "Friends" thing is honest. But you can jump ladders with women pretty easily. If she likes money, then the moment she realises a friend has money, he's jumped ladder.
As far as the dancing thing, we all takes cars very seriously. And when we meet a girl that does NOT take cars seriously, we think "Oh well, that's too bad" and we accept them for other things. Same thing. you don't have to dance to be around a dancer. You DO however, have to appreciate it in some way shape or form. But again, I've been proven wrong on that before (I know girls who gave up their life long dreams because their douchebag boyfriend pick on them for it). Which again, goes back to everything being chance.
Be yourself. If you were yourself that night when you guys talked, then you'll be good. Don't pretend. If you were pretending, then you'll need a way to segue back to you, or accept the fact that you were lying and any way of getting her closer will involve trickery and duplicity. Good luck with that.
You'll have to explain to me about her situation for her say "Friends". She could be fresh out of something, she could be working on someone else before she met you, she could have a boyfriend and be a total cheating trapeze artist. Follow up with me, and I'll tell you what I see.