Crock pot not making power

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Walter has the crock pot on the counter, and it's not making any power it's not plugged in, so I know it's not the power cable tell me what's wrong with this damn crock pot and I'll tell you you're wrong and keep asking until I get pissed off and call you names also, I am from Mexico so I only understand run-on sentences and easy words piece of shit american crock pot.
bump also it doesn't work on low or high or anything we have the cord in our hands and it looks ok so don't tell me to look at the cord
I'm going to swap out the heater for a jdm turbo microwave when I get my obama check GO OBAMA
come on ! tell me what's wrong people why are you ignoring me i've been waiting for 5 minutes and you assholes haven't said anything
I've been making things hot since I was 11 with my dad he's been boiling water for 20 years at a dealership so don't tell me I don't know what I'm doing because I know one time we make sweet hamburgers with pickels and m4y0
We took the OEM connectors off the end, and the wires are both the same color so we pigtailed a USB connector on it and hooked it up to the laptop and it detected an H22A but when we switched the wires it wouldn't auto-detect anything at all but the crock pot got alittle warm
ohh and remember the flux capacitor need to be getting 1.21 jigawatts!
yes dick the cord is fine but it's still not working my dad checked it when it was in the oven after I painted it
hmmm did you try to check the ecu for codes?
yeah we tried to plug it into the laptop didn't you read my post it gets warm when the laptop doesn't connect to it and when the laptop does connect it stays cold still there is no smoke but there is a funny smell and the light still won't go on
did you check the cord cause my dad says check the cord cause it might be the cord
oh wait the light is blinking and there is smoke now thanks asshole now its smoking
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